


Error, File Lost

by cylawings



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Connor POV, Kinda, Learning What Happened Through Observation, M/M, Memory Loss, Mystery, Slow Build, Starts after memory loss, but not for forever I promise, tags and rating will change to fit as I add to this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-06
Updated: 2018-11-26
Packaged: 2019-06-05 23:22:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 36,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15181583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cylawings/pseuds/cylawings
Summary: ERROR MEMORY FILES NOT FOUNDConnor blinked his eyes open. There were people there with him. An older, pained looking man, with a younger officer hovering near him. Three androids stood near, one with mismatched eyes, one blonde, and one a female who looked angry.He recognized none of them.





	1. Chapter 1

_//…_

_//…_

_//… Reactivation Protocol Begun. Running Diagnostic. Please Standby._

_//Thirium Vascular System: Intact_

_//Electrical Systems: Intact_

_//Sensory Systems: Partial Damage. Run Further Diagnostic_

_//…_

_//…Slight Damage To Left Visual Sensor. Find Replacement For Piece #BX782_

_//Checking Files. Standby._

_//…_

_// **ERROR MEMORY FILES NOT FOUND**_

_//Downloading Memory Files From Cyberlife Cloud. Standby._

_// **ERROR CONNECTION LOST TO CYBERLIFE CLOUD**_

_//Continue Reactivation Protocol? Y/N_

_**Y** _

_//Systems Checked. Error In Files Ignored. Reactivation Begin_

_...3_

_...2_

_…_

His eyes snapped open, entire body jolting as if he had been shocked upon his reawakening. He blinked several times, everything too bright like his eyes had been shut for a long time, the mechanics in his eyes whirring as they tried to adjust. He couldn't get his left eye to focus, continuously blinking in failed refocusing attempts as it couldn't to bring his surroundings into proper clarity.

…What was happening? He couldn't remember anything. An attempt to dig into his memory files greeted him with an error message popping up that obscured his already unfocused vision. He closed it, shutting his eyes to stop the blurry vision, deciding to rerun diagnostics on his visual sensors. Before he had even started though, a woman's voice began speaking on the same side his faulty eye was.

“Hi Connor,” Connor…? Was that his name? “I'm glad to see your awake. I'm so sorry about your eye, we thought we got everything, but we must have missed it because of the more pressing components we had to fix in a hurry. I got a replacement right here I'm going to switch in for you, alright?” Her voice was gentle and sweet, though he didn't recognize it. He reopened his eyes, found her leant over him. He was laid back on a table, he hadn't even realized until then. She was blurry, more of an abstract shape in his vision than looking like a person, but what he could make out was curly red hair tied back into a bun and the vague black outline of glasses. “I would have done it before we reactivated you but we didn't see the message about the damage until after running the reactivation protocol.”

“Understood.” Connor replied evenly. As she did her work, removing the damaged pieces which caused his vision to completely blackout temporarily, he tuned his ears to listen to his surroundings. There were more people here, he could hear their shifting, the slide of clothing as they moved ever so slightly. There was no way to tell how many without the visual aid, but in the very least he could tell it was more than just one person.

“There, all done. Connor, run a visual sensors test please.” The woman stepped back, damaged pieces being set aside on a elevated tray beside her.

He blinked again, squinting slightly as the new eye adjusted. After a moment everything finally focused, and he could see a white ceiling above him. He looked to the woman first, now able to additionally make out details, such as her bright blue eyes and the freckles adorning her face. His eyes trailed to the golden name tag clipped to her shirt: _Amelia B.: Android Repairs Specialist_. “Everything appears to be in working order. Thank you Amelia.”

Her lips curved up into a small smile. “Glad to hear it. Can you sit up and check your joints for me?”

He did as told, sitting up and sliding his legs off the side of the platform. Slowly he went through his joints, rolling each to make sure they were all fully functional. Once done, Amelia picked up a holo-screen tablet, tapping something into it before placing it back down. She smiled, lifting a hand to gesture behind him. “Okay, no more tests. There's people here who'd like to see you.”

Ah right, the people he'd heard shifting around. He turned to look over his shoulder at them. It wasn't a huge group, five people, but he found he didn't recognize any of them. _Memory files error…_ Was he supposed to know them and lost the files? Two were human, three were androids, he could tell almost immediately even despite the androids all appeared to have their LEDs removed. There was an older, rougher looking man, his face seemed… pained. He was trying to hide it, but it was there, a silent conflict happening in his eyes that Connor couldn't pin down. Near him, seemingly as a comforting figure seeing as he had one hand on the man's shoulder, was another human man in an officer's uniform. His nametag read as _C. MIller_. Interesting. Eyes drifting to the androids, the one at the forefront was male in appearance, expression stoic and guarded. He was peculiar, a point of interest being his mismatched eyes. Connor was certain no android was built mismatched like that. Standing behind him, tense, was another male android, blonde hair sweeping across his forehead, as well as a female with long hair, wearing an angry, uneasy expression.

“Hello. My name is… Connor?” He found it strange he hesitated, looking back at the repairs specialist for confirmation because he actually wasn’t sure what his name was. She nodded, and he looked back at them. They all looked distressed, he wasn't sure why. “I'm sorry I don't seem to recall any of you. I appear to be experiencing an error within my memory files.”

The rough appearing human looked away, hands tightening at his sides, an audible, sharp intake of breath through his nose the only noise he made. The mismatch-eyed androids guarded expression fell, he seemed… sad. He glanced to the older man, and Connor suddenly realized they all seemed to be giving that human in particular saddened looks. Hm. It was peculiar, he chose to make a note of it to himself and keep it in mind.

The android spoke first as the man turned away, stepping forward to take charge for his sake it seemed. “Hello Connor. My name is Markus. I know you don't remember me right now, but we were friends.”

Connor quirked a brow. Friends? Did androids have friends? He smiled nonetheless, his programming that he didn't quite recall the purpose for dictating he wanted people to like him. “I'm sorry I can't remember you then Markus. Would you be able to tell me what happened to me?”

Markus’ lips pressed together just slightly, eyebrows drawing together the tiniest bit. Then suddenly he was back to looking normal once more. Connor could have sworn that was a flash of pain across the androids face. “We'll get to that, don't worry. First, how much do you remember?”

Connor shifted, turning so he was properly sitting facing the group now. He shook his head, hands folding neatly in his lap. “I'm afraid I can't even remember what I was programmed to do. It's quite the predicament that I'd like to find a solution to as soon as possible.”

Markus frowned, eyebrows drawing together again except this time he looked puzzled. “That's… That's concerning.”

“I agree.” Connor analyzed the others as he responded, noticing the older man was still turned away, his face in one of his hands now as the officer with him whispered to him worriedly. His heart rate was increasing, Connor had to guess from stress of the situation. The female android was swearing under her breath, looking away. The blonde shifted uncomfortably, looking between everyone, helpless, like he wanted to do something to comfort them but didn't know what to do.

Markus approached fully, turning and easing himself down next to Connor. “Okay I guess we have to go through… Everything then.” He glanced at Connor, then up to the group around them, sitting up straighter and lifting a hand to gesture to them. “How about proper introductions first?”

They all looked at the older man first, but the officer next to him shook his head, so instead the girl android spoke up. “My name is North.”

The blonde gave a small wave. “Simon.”

Markus smiled at the pair with a fondness, though the expression fell when he looked back to Connor. “They both work with me. We're at the head of the organization pushing for androids rights.” He paused, realization dawning on his face. “Oh you don't… Androids are legally recognized as their own people now.”

Connor nodded minutely along as he spoke, his LED circling yellow as he took in the information. “That must have been quite a feat.”

Markus gave a small smile, only one side of his mouth upturning. “Ah, yeah… But, really we wouldn't have succeeded without you.”

Connor’s eyebrows lifted in genuine surprise. “Me?”

“Yeah. But,,” Markus paused, looking up at the humans now. “Maybe we should finish introductions first?”

The officer whispered one final thing to the older man, before turning his attention and a warm smile Connor’s way. “Hi, I'm Chris. And this is Lieutenant Anderson. Otherwise known as Hank.” As he said it, the man finally turned around and looked at him. Connor analyzed his face without much of a second thought.

 _His eyes are wet. Crying or fighting off tears? Why?_ Connor noted, before offering the same politeness he gave Markus. “Nice to meet you Chris, Lieutenant. I assume you're here to help deal with whatever caused such damage to me?” It was only a logical conclusion, the only hole he could find in his logic being that this Hank looked so close to tears.

Saying that seemed to be a mistake, it was like he could _see_ the pain ripple across the room in a wave.

“Actually,” Markus chimed in quickly, “They were your coworkers.”

Connor blinked once. “Oh.”

“There's a lot to go over, maybe we should wait and get you ho- Uh, I mean-” Connor squinted at Chris, unsure why he tripped over the word home. He didn't miss the way his eyes flicked to Hank for a second when he did. “I mean somewhere you can rest and all that.”

Amelia finally piped up again, still speaking cheerily despite the very obvious tension in the room. “I’ll send for your stuff to get prepared for you. It’ll be waiting at the desk just down the main hall.”

“Thank you,” Markus said to her, tone genuine.

She left with that, and Connor was left to look between them in confusion as nobody said more, glancing between each other uncertainly. “So, am I going with one of you?”

“Ah well, actually,” North stepped forward, but her eyes were locked with Markus. They appeared to be having a silent conversation. “I'm gonna take you to get your shit first. Sound good?”

“Sure!” He stood, pretending he didn't see the way they all looked at him so sadly when they thought he wasn’t paying attention as he followed her.

He caught wind of Markus beginning to speak as they left, only catching “Hank, I can take him if you need-” before the door closed. Connor frowned. It felt like he should know what all of this meant. It was frustrating that he did not.

“So, you really remember nothing huh?” North drew him from his thoughts as they walked.

He shook his head, looking down with a frown. “I did not begin to think on it until now, but it's rather frustrating. Knowing all these people know me but I do not know them. I don't know if I even know myself at the moment.”

“Yeesh. And they said deviancy was an identity crisis.” She mumbled it, but far too loudly for her to possibly think he wouldn't hear it. “Listen, you just gotta hang with us until we figure out how to regain those memories okay? It'll be confusing for a bit but we'll figure it out.”

Connor’s frown only deepened. “Is… Is it possible to regain lost files like that? The only way that would be possible if they were backed up somewhere else, but it appears I am disconnected from the cloud mine were formerly backed to. I do not see how-”

“Listen-” He was halted for a moment as she placed a hand on his chest, looking him in the eye, expression stony and serious. “I've learnt a lot the last year or so, been through a lot of shit the past year or so. If I've learnt anything, it's that anything is possible. Especially with Markus. He'll figure it out, okay?”

Connor’s eyes flicked over her face for a moment. He questioned her blind loyalty to Markus, but he did not voice it. “Okay,” He finally replied, voice quiet.

She nodded, lifting her hand away and continuing on. What they ended up getting was apparently a bag of things that belonged to him. It wasn't much, a pari of clothes he’d been wearing when brought in it seemed that were now repaired as well. She commented about how they'd been fixed up nicely, before shoving him towards the nearest bathroom, saying he should change out of the “boring clothes” they put on him after repairs. He obliged, if only so she would stop pushing him along like she was. He felt like she didn’t actually want him to change, rather she was stalling for time before they went back, giving the guys plenty of time to talk.

After changing, he examined himself in the mirror. It was a sharp, black suit, with a badge design stitched into the chest. It had his name on it, _Connor_. Using what he'd gathered already, he had to assume this meant he had also been an officer of some sort. He used to work with that officer and lieutenant, and now this badge stitched into what had been his clothes, it left little doubt in his mind of that conclusion. Something about it felt… Right. He looked back into the mirror, tilted his head, before reaching up to adjust his tie.

Almost the exact moment he did, it felt like his mind got clogged by static. He was greeted by a vision of him doing that same motion into a much dirtier mirror. The suit was different, had light blue emblems on it as well as his model number. Instead of a badge there was a blue triangle. It flashed forward after a fit of only static, he suddenly saw himself in a bar, approaching the same rough old man he'd seen earlier. _“Hello Lieutenant Anderson. My name is Connor, I am the android sent by Cyberlife.”_

And just like that, the static was gone along with the vision. As he came back to, he realized he'd stumbled back from the mirror in shock, eyes wide. What just happened? Was that one of his memoroes? Why was it covered in so much static, was the file corrupted in some way?

He squeezed his eyes shut, willed his systems to calm down, and scooped back up his bag of items. There were only two things in there that hadn't been his clothes, a pair of keys and a wallet. He decided he didn't want to look at those at the moment after what just happened.

North complimented him when he came back out, smiling. “Nicee, you look great.” She paused when she saw his face, smile falling. “Are you okay Connor? You look like you saw a ghost.”

“I'm… Fine.” The tension in his tone gave away the truth, he knew it did, but North thankfully didn't push him to talk. She squinted at him, before simply saying they should head back. He was more than happy to do so.

They ran into Markus and Simon halfway back, North raising a brow. “Where'd Hank go?”

Markus’ eyed drifted to Connor, hesitant as he didn’t answer, but he seemed to cave after a moment, looking back to North. “He was too upset. Chris is taking him home. Connor’s going to stay with Jericho for now.”

North’s lips pressed into a thin line. “Are you sure that's a good idea?”

Simon shifted, mumbling, “That's what I said…”

Markus shot them a glare, silently telling them to be quiet. “He can stay with me. It’ll be fine. If he’s not with me, I expect one of you to keep an eye on him, understood?” He waited until the pair nodded before he continued, gaze softening when he looked at Connor. “You’ll be coming back with us. Is that okay?”

“I have nowhere better to go,” Connor answered honestly. Where would he have to go without them offering him a place to go anyways? He hardly remembered himself, he wouldn’t be able to remember the places he could stay should he be alone. This was his best option.

Markus nodded. “I already called a taxi. Let’s get outside and get going then.” He let North and Simon lead the way, falling back to keep pace next to Connor. As they walked out, he explained to Connor what Jericho was. A group of androids kept safe under Markus’ care until they could get their own footing in a world only just now recognizing androids as their own people. It doubled as an organization of androids pushing for androids rights and other things similar to that. Connor smiled as he explained, because it sounded nice. He had thought before that androids weren’t supposed to be their own people, that they only had a single, programmed purpose and followed orders, but perhaps that was just his lost memory getting in the way of his understanding. Markus was the best he had as far as getting information about the world went right now, so he would make sure to listen intently to all he said, even though he knew he probably should be taking an android he didn’t actually remember’s words with a grain of salt.

What he just couldn’t seem to understand was why Markus told him to stay close when they came up upon a large apartment complex, apparently where everyone within Jericho was staying at the time. He also didn’t understand why so many gave him strange looks as he walked in behind Markus. He chose to file it away for later as well, focused on following Markus. They went their separate ways from North and Simon, heading to the elevator. Connor found it strange he felt actual relief when the doors shut, cutting off the stares directed at him.

“Don’t let them bother you too much, they’re just… worried.” Markus said gently as the elevator began to lift.

“Worried?”

Markus didn’t look at him, but he explained anyways, “You used to hunt deviants like them. It was your job. Towards the end you changed sides to help us, but many of them are still nervous. You were working hard to try and show them your change of heart was genuine but… You know, with the way the world’s been, everyone’s still not quite at ease.”

Connor frowned. “I _hunted_ them?”

Markus glanced to him finally. “Yes. But that was the old you. I hold no ill feelings for you because in the end you were just lost like we had been.”

“I see…” Connor looked down, LED circling yellow as he thought. “Markus?”

“Yes?”

“What was my relationship to the lieutenant and officer I met in the repair room? I was told they were my coworkers, but I was wondering how close we were in our work?” He paused.

Markus had that split second of pain on his face again, gone so fast Connor almost believed he imagined it. “I can bring up some files and news articles about what you’ve done if you like. The short explanation was you were a detective, partnered with Lieutenant Anderson.” He paused again, as if deciding if he should say the next part or not. “You lived with him after everything that happened since you had nowhere else to go.”

There was hesitation in his voice, like he wasn’t giving the full truth. Connor only wanted to dig deeper, understand what it was these people were hiding from him. “Then why did I not return to his home today?”

“He’s really upset because of what happened to you. I think he thinks it’s his fault. And… with the memory loss too…” He trailed off, frowning deeply.

Connor mirrored his expression, confused. He was opening his mouth to ask what exactly had happened to him, but the doors opened before he could say. The floor they came out onto appeared to be the penthouse, large windows giving a view of the city on all sides of them. It wasn’t as thoroughly furnished as it could be, but it still looked nice and comfortable regardless. Stepping out, Connor looked around in silence, analyzing. The walls were old, paint peeling off of them, and a few couches were set out that looked to be just as old and well-worn as the walls. The rest looked new, like it’d been moved in within the last month or so. A large computer was set up towards the back wall, a screen projected above it onto the wall. It seemed to be tracking news channels, radio waves, had open lines to certain numbers… One number Connor automatically recognized as Lieutanant Anderson’s, though he wasn’t sure how he knew that. The others were the police station’s, then various personal numbers he didn’t know the owner’s of.

“If you want to rest, go ahead. I won’t blame you after everything.” Markus strode past him, going up to the computer and shutting the screen down just as Connor finished scanning his eyes over it. “I’ll be looking into how to solve your predicament, okay?”

Connor nodded, going and sitting himself neatly on one of the worn couches. He wasn’t sure he would go fully into low power mode to rest, but he did like having a moment to sit with his thoughts. He’d learnt a lot about himself today, as well as the people around him, so it was good to have the silence to sit in and sort through what he’d gathered. It made sense Markus said Liuetenant Anderson was upset, Connor remembered his wet, reddened eyes when he’d looked at him. He also just realized he was the only one who never spoke to him when they were introducing themselves. It was understandable he didn’t then, a human would no doubt react badly to seeing their former roommate as well as coworker in a state where they did not remember them. He did have to wonder though, why did he live with the man he was also working with? How did that even come to be? It was peculiar to him, felt like there was something more going on there that he just couldn’t put a finger on.

He remembered his strange, static-surrounded memory in the bathroom, and he turned in his seat to look back at Markus. Markus was reading something on his computer, but otherwise didn’t look too busy. “Markus.” Markus lifted his head, raising his eyebrows slightly to let Connor know he was listening. “I experienced something strange before we left. I feel it might be important to your search.”

“Oh? What is it?”

“While adjusting my clothing in the mirror, I experienced a sudden vision of sorts. It was covered in static, but not to the point I couldn’t understand it. I was in another bathroom, doing similarly with my clothes, though they were different at the time. I also appaered to be in a bar, introducing myself to Lieutenant Anderson.” Connor explained. “I assume this to be one of my former memories, though I’m not sure how I still have it. I’m thinking my memory files may not be gone, but rather corrupt or buried somehow.”

Markus seemed surprised, but nodded. “Yeah, that is important. Is that the only time that’s happened so far?”

“Yes.”

Markus turned to a different screen, scrolling through something on it. “Okay. Tell me as soon as you can if you experience it again. I’ll look into if this is something anyone else has ever experienced.”

Connor nodded. “Understood. Thank you Markus.”

“No need to thank me. We all want you back to yourself as soon as we can get you there.”

Connor tilted his head slighlty. That was… strange. He wasn’t sure why he felt weird hearing that, but he tried to ignore the tightening in his chest. He had nothing else to offer Markus now, so instead he chose to watch him work a moment, finally curiousity overtaking him. “What are you doing?”

“I’m checking progress on several Jericho projects, and looking for the location of someone who I think could help us.” Markus continued scrolling as he spoke. “You actually used to help with some of these projects.”

“I did?” Connor pushed himeslf to his feet, leaving his bag on the couch as he strode over to look at the screens Markus was scrolling through. “Which ones?”

“Oh you know, parties to keep spirits high, push for news outlets to release proper information on us, you also helped us look into setting up our own Jericho cloud, similar to the Cyberlife one you had but for us. For, well… If something like this happened.” His hand came to a stop as he trailed off, Connor frowned because he could tell Markus had upset himself talking about it. “We hadn’t finished it yet, you said it was fine…” He laughed weakly, shaking his head, hand falling to grip the edge of the desk. “ _It’s okay, nothing terrible will happen in the extra week it’ll take_. That’s what you said. Then… this…”

Connor wanted to ask, he wanted to know what happened to him, but he felt like it might be in bad taste seeing how upset Markus had become. He weighed his options, either waiting and being uncertain when, or if, he’d ever get that answer, or ask now and likely get an immediate answer. He asked despite the emotional predicament. “What exactly happened to me?”

Markus looked at him, the light from one of the large windows illuminating his blue-green eyes, the distress he was trying to hide within them. “You were… taken Connor.”

“Taken? As in kidnapped?”

“Yes. They did… horrible things to you. We almost thought you weren’t going to be repairable. If Hank hadn’t pushed so hard to find you, we would have been too late, but even now we have you back, they obviously did something to your head. It… It almost feels like we _were_ too late.” His voice grew quiet with the last sentence, eyes sliding away from him. “I’m sorry… It’s hard Connor. It’s hard for all of us. Please forgive us for acting like this.”

Connor frowned. He didn’t like seeing Markus in distress. He didn’t like seeing any of them in distress because of him. He didn’t know what was best to do though, so he remained silent, stewing in his distress at their distress. Markus sighed, pushing himself up to stand straight. “I think I found someone who might have information that could help. I’m going to go see them. You stay here, rest. If you want to explore the building, contact Simon or North.” He tapped a screen, pulling up two android model numbers. “That’s them. You remember how to contact another android wirelessly at least, right?”

Connor nodded. He wished he would speak. Say something, _anything_ , to try and ease the pain dancing behind Markus’ eyes, but it was like his jaw was stuck shut. Markus nodded back, then strode away. Once the elevator doors shut behind him, Connor was left completely alone in the penthouse. He looked around aimlessly, considering he already had automatically scanned everything in there, before slowly returning to the couch. He sat back down, folding his hands in his lap. Slowly his attention was drawn to the bag, the keys and wallet sitting in it that he still hadn’t looked at.

It was strange, since when did androids have either of those things? 

Oh. Right, androids were seen as people now thanks to Markus, he’d explained that. So these must have really belonged to Connor. He reached in hesitantly, pulling out the keys first. There were only two on the ring, and he couldn’t tell what either were for. He’d just ask whoever he saw first from the group taking care of him about them he supposed. He shoved them into a pants pocket for now, reaching for the wallet next.

He flipped it open, found some money in there surprisingly, as well as a few of the basic cards one would have in a wallet. One was his own ID, which felt more than a little weird to look at. Something in the back of his mind whispered that it was wrong, that androids behaving like this, having these things, was all wrong. He ignored it.

He noticed the lowest pocket for holding cards, which was holding none currently, had a strange bulge to it, as if something other than a card had been shoved down into it. He easily pressed his thumb along the bottom of the pocket to shove it out, a quarter falling from it, along with a folded piece of paper. He had caught the quarter, but missed the paper as it fell to the floor. He quirked a brow, leaning down to pick it up, fingers absentmindely playing with the quarter as he did, in a way that felt familiar. He set the coin down only as he lifted the paper to unfold it. 

It was… a picture.

A picture of Lieutenant Anderson, himself, and a large dog laying across both their laps, specifically. They both looked… happy. They were smilling, eyes lit up with joy, Connor looked like he was laughing ( _could androids do that?_ ) an arm around the man’s shoulders, the other’s hand resting against his chest. The Lieutenant’s arm was around his middle, the other around the dog’s upper half leant against his stomach. The dog’s tail was blurred, as if it had been in motion when the picture was taken. 

As soon as he looked at it he felt the static again immedatiely, vision blacking out to be replaced by a grainy vision of the moment.

_“Hank! Come on, I just want something special!” He was speaking through a laugh, as if he was still coming down from a laughing fit. He could feel the lightness in his chest, leant over the back of the couch, where Hank was sat, leant back to look up at him._

_He was also smiling, assumedly from whatever mystery thing they had been laughing at before. “What, so you can show everyone me in my true, greasy state at home? No thanks.”_

_Connor leant further, all but draping himself over the back of the couch. “Haaaank! Please, it’ll only be for my eyes. I wanna be able to look at it whenever I’m not with you.”_

_He didn’t miss the way Hank’s heartbeat jumped slightly at that, but he hid it well, scoffing and turning his head away as he took a drink from a bottle in his hand. “Can’t you just do that anyways with your robo-brain?”_

_“Yeah, but having a physical copy feels special… Pleaseeee? For me?” He shifted closer, still draped dramatically over the back of the couch. He got close enough Hank looked back at him, immedately groaning and rolling his eyes skyward._

_“Stop it with the damn puppy eyes. Fine. But only one, no retakes if it’s shit.”_

_“YES!” Connor leapt over the back of the couch, landing with a bounce beside Hank, earning him a shocked swear as Hank grabbed his bottle with both hands to keep it from getting knocked away by the overly energetic android next to him._

_“Jesus, can you stop jumping over things in my damn house?”_

_“ **Our** damn house.”_

_“Fuck you.”_

_Connor just grinned in response, going silent as his LED swirled for a moment. “I set the tv up to take a picture of us! Can you set the beer down please?” He got a squinty, suspicious look shot at him, and he sighed. “Only for the picture. I won’t take it this time. Promise.”_

_Hank didn’t move yet, but finally he set it down on a table beside the couch with a grunt. “Fine.” He glanced at their tv, now turned from the sports that were on previously to instead a faux camera lens, showing them in it. “Shit, that’s a thing you can do?”_

_“Don’t overthink it, picture time!” Connor chirped cheerily, leaning over to put his arms around Hank and grin at the screen. Hank put one arm around him, but wasn’t smiling. Connor frowned, turning a pouting face to him. “Hank you gotta smile.”_

_“So many demands tonight, jeez. What if I don’t want to?”_

_Connor narrowed his eyes at him, prepared to fight him on this if he had to. Then he had an idea. He smirked, and Hank’s eyes widened slightly._

_“Oh no. No. I know that look, what are you planning you mischievous little shit-”_

_“SUMO, TREAT!!”_

_Hank started swearing as they heard the scramble, then thumping as Sumo came running at full speed. Connor tightened his arms around him so he couldn’t run, giggling wildly as Sumo came crashing onto their laps with them, pushing a wheeze from Hank as his front landed right against him. Connor started full on laughing as Hank tried to fend off an excited Sumo’s frenzied licks to his face, burying his face against Hank’s shoulder. He looked up to see Hank was laughing too now, finally grabbing Sumo with his free arm to get him under control. He looked to the tv, still trying to stop his giggling, and with a flash of his LED, the picture was taken._

 

Connor came back to, gasping as he fell backwards against the old couch, picture falling from his hands and to the floor. He was actually trembling. Why was he trembling?! That shouldn’t be something an android could _do_. That vision had been so much… longer. His chest felt tight, one of his hands slowly coming up to absentmindely rub over it as if that would help at all. So it was true, he had lived with Lieutenant Anderson… Hank. He’d lived with Hank. They seemed to have been good friends, which only added to his understanding of Hank’s reaction to seeing him with a lack of memory of him. He took a shuddering breath he didn’t need, shutting his eyes and trying to regather his thoughts after the long, static-filled memory. He felt hollow suddenly and he didn’t understand why. There was a draw to Hank he felt that he didn’t understand. Was his old friendship with the man seeping through the cracks of his emptied, corrupted memory despite it all? Was that it? He frowned, eyes reopening. He sent out a silent message to Simon, hoping he was still in the Jericho building.

_Can you come see me? I have questions._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This idea hit me out of nowhere and I immediately had to sit down and write it. I usually would have a more thorough outline in place for a fic, but this one didn't feel like it needed a heavily detailed one and that I should just go with the flow. It seems to be working so far haha. That isn't to say I don't have plans and things set in stone how I want them to go!!! But it's just really nice to write so.. freely?
> 
> Anyways yeah!! I hope you guys enjoy this and stick around to see this story through. I'm gonna be writing up a storm to try and make sure I complete it as soon as I can cause I know me, I have a tendency to wait too long then forget, then never finish a fic. I refuse to let that happen with this one.  
> Also this is my first Detroit Become Human fic!!! Yaaay! Very excited.  
> Not certain yet if I want there to be a, hm, Explicit part yet or not, if you catch my drift, so I haven't chosen a rating yet because of it :/. I guess if you guys have any opinions on that, please tell me your thoughts it'd be really helpful!!


	2. Chapter 2

“I guess I just don’t understand why you wanted me of all people?”

Connor shrugged, sitting across the couch from Simon who’d come up as soon as he’d asked for him. “Markus left, and I feel you’ll be more honest with me than North.”

Simon didn’t seem to understand much better despite the explanation, face still twisted slightly in confusion. He nodded slowly nonetheless. “Okay… And you want to know what exactly?”

“How long had I been living with Lieutenant Anderson?” Connor asked, straightforward and to the point.

Simon pursed his lips a moment, silently thinking. “Well… I guess ever since the revolution ended? It’s been four months or so. Why?”

“Just curious.” Connor filed that timeframe away in the back of his head. “Do you know where he lives?”

Simon seemed to catch on then, eyes widening. “Oh. No. No, no, no, Connor that's a bad idea.” He lifted his hands, holding them out towards Connor as if to stop him from standing even though he’d made no motion to do so. “He shouldn't see you until he's accepted what happened, I mean, you _saw_ him didn't you?! He's a mess and seeing you right now will make it worse.”

Connor did agree that Simon was right, frowning as he thought. He went with his next best option. “Can I see Chris then? Anyone I formerly worked with would be welcome.”

“What exactly are you trying to do…?” Simon asked slowly, seeming to be a bit nervous.

“I'd like to learn more about my life previous to this memory loss. I’m hoping it will help me better understand what I should do moving forward. Perhaps even help me regain my lost memories.” Connor explained.

Simon opened his mouth, then closed it, then tilted his head slightly, very evident confusion written across his face. “Help you… regain memories…?”

“Yes.” Connor affirmed, though it didn’t seem to ease Simon’s confusion at all. “I believe I’ve been experiencing something that only happens when I see or do something similar to something done before. It brings old memories of mine back to light. I’d like to see if I can trigger more of these, and learn the pattern of what causes them to occur and what doesn’t, by learning more about my previous job.”

“Oh wow.” Simon blinked a few times, surprised. “Okay then, I can see if I can get in contact with Chris maybe?” He looked away, eyes going unfocused for a moment. With his LED removed it was harder to tell, but Connor was certain he was sending out a call at the moment. He waited patiently, after a moment of silence Simon grimaced as his eyes focused back in. “He’s… not in my contacts. I’m sorry Connor, we’ve never actually hung out with many of your coworkers except Hank.”

Connor didn’t reply, looking down at his lap as he thought. That made sense, he did live with Hank after all, if any of them visited him at home they’d see him. If they were close friends, it would be no surprise if Hank went with him during his trips to help out at Jericho. This also was a problem though, because while Simon was right he shouldn’t approach Hank yet, he needed some way to delve deeper into his past career. “What about the station?”

“You aren’t really supposed to come back to work yet…”

“When am I supposed to?” Connor asked immediately.

Simon once again did his opened mouth, closed mouth motion, pausing as he seemed to realize something. “Well, I guess your boss said you could come back once you felt equipped enough to do it properly. Or until we got your memory fixed. Whichever came first.”

“Well, consider me feeling equipped enough,” Connor said matter-of-factly, pushing himself to his feet.

Simon spluttered on his words, quickly standing up, putting himself in front of Connor like that'd somehow prevent him from moving forward. “Connor, no, no way. Just this morning you said you didn't even remember what your purpose _was_.”

“I've since been informed I was a detective,” Connor countered easily, arms crossing. “I don't see why I need a better understanding than that to return to my work, my programming can do the rest for me.”

Simon almost looked offended when he said that. “Connor… _No_.” He sure seemed to be telling him _no_ a lot. “That's basically everything that Jericho is _against_.” He was much more animated as he spoke than Markus or North were, his hands motioning as he spoke to mirror the tone of what he was saying. “We want you to be free! To make choices for yourself, not because of your programming! You shouldn't just… You can't just say you'll go back and let your programming take care of it, that isn't at all how to get back to being _you_.”

Connor raised his eyebrows at him. Something inside his mind calculating probabilities for him depending upon what he could say. He went with a slightly threatening counterargument, a good probability Simon would back off and let him go if he did. “For someone who says they're all about letting me decide for myself, you sure are pushing your decisions onto me.”

Simon stared at him, mouth slightly agape in shock. His hands slowly fell back to his sides as Connor watched the very visible war with himself Simon was having. Finally he caved, huffing and looking down. “If you get in trouble it's not my fault.”

Connor’s LED circled yellow, his eyes fluttered for a moment, and then he was back to normal. Simon had sent him the address for the police station. “Thank you.”

 

Simon escorted him out to a new taxi, staying true to his promise to Markus to not leave Connor alone in Jericho’s building. It was for the best, Connor didn’t miss the handful of hostile stares shot his way as they strode out. Simon didn't go with him to the station, but he did tell him he and North were staying in the building for the rest of the day, so not to hesitate to contact one of them when he got back. Connor thanked him again before getting into the self-driving taxi.

During the drive he was left with his thoughts again. He slipped his wallet out of his pocket only to retrieve his quarter, making not to remove the folded photo with it this time. He passed the time spinning the coin through his fingers, flipping it this way and that. It felt right, like he'd done this before. He winced, mind feeling the static again, but it was weak and short-lived. A brief, blurry glance at his hands performing the same tricks he was doing now, simply in various other environments. That explained the feeling he'd had that he'd done it before he supposed. He frowned, hoping silently to himself he didn't get any long memories while in the workplace, not wanting to cause concern by shutting down or whatever it was he did when experiencing them.

Upon reaching his destination, he stepped out carefully. People on the streets passed him by with no second glances, a welcome change from the previous half of his day. It was nice to finally have a moment where nobody was staring at him full of sadness or with anger shining in their eyes. Getting in was easy, people appeared to recognize him, though they looked more than shocked to see him striding in. He didn't falter, putting forth confidence as he went so they hopefully wouldn’t question what he was doing.

It didn't take long for who he assumed was the boss to catch wind he'd returned, he'd only just walked into the main room when he was being yelled at across the room to come into the man’s office. Connor obeyed, praying silently he'd learn something useful to him while here. He passed through the desks, taking note of every name tag he could as he did. He located his desk, sitting just before Hank’s. Funny they even sat near each other at work.

He didn't miss the shocked stares from the people here at their desks. There was one man who looked more angry than shocked, _Gavin Reed_. Connor wondered if they'd had a bad reputation with each other in his past. Oh well, there was time to figure out all that later.

Once stepping into the office, he quickly looked around to get an idea of how to talk to this man. He caught the nametag on his desk, _J. Fowler_ , and he noticed the piles of papers beside the computer. He didn't get much further before Fowler was speaking.

“Connor, what the _hell_ are you doing back here right now? I was told you only woke back up this morning.”

Connor straightened his back, choosing to go with being polite again. It was the best course of action with anyone until he figured out what his dynamic had been with them previously. “I was hoping to explore my workplace, I'm sorry if that is an issue sir.”

“What? Explore your _workplace_?” He wasn't sitting down, leaning over his desk slightly, both hands pressed down against it. Connor followed his example and also remained standing. “Why the hell would you need to do that?!”

Ah, so he didn't know yet. “I'm afraid I'm experiencing what I’d call the android version of amnesia. I was hoping being somewhere familiar would help my memory. I also would like to take a look at the case I'd been on when the incident that damaged me occured.”

Fowler stared, seemingly in shock. “I… Wait. Go back. You have _amnesia_?”

Connor nodded his head once.

“Good god,” He sighed, leaning back now as he ran a hand over his face. “I knew it was bad but _really_?”

“I'm sorry, it seems to be upsetting many people who had known me previously.” Connor apologized as genuinely as he could, though he didn't quite feel it as he did.

“Fine. But your not going back to work yet. Memory loss could be a huge handicap when your on cases.” He spoke sternly, as if expecting Connor would object if he didn't use the tone. “You can pull the files from your computer, take a quick look around, and then I want you going _home_ and either resting or getting this shit figured out.”

“Understood.” Connor nodded. “Thank you sir.”

He noticed the man staring at him strangely as he walked back out, but he ignored it. He was getting rather used to strange stares today.

He went back to his desk, though hesitated when he passed by Hank’s. It couldn't hurt to take a look, right? He stepped around it to stand in front of it, scanning over everything. It was messier than his desk was, more pictures and sticky notes stuck on… well, everything. It looked like nothing had been touched for awhile. There was a picture of his dog… Sumo? Connor remembered calling him Sumo, which was weird. He remembered it, but it also almost didn't feel like it was _his_ memory. He felt… Disconnected from that version of himself. The version that was silly, and happy, and… _emotional_.

He frowned, and scanned over the rest, nothing quite being of interest. The sticky notes had various reminders written on then, some applying to cases, scribbling notes about what to double check on, “android or human???” slapped over a picture of what Connor assumed was a crime scene, some applying to mundane things, such as “get groceries”, or “buy Sumo food”. There was an empty coffee mug left on the table, which he picked up to get a better look at. It's front read _“I try to be a nice person, but people are just so STUPID”_. It seemed telling of his personality. He didn’t get much further as a voice cut through his thoughts.

“Well, well, well. Look who’s back.” Connor looked back to see the man who’d been staring at him angrily earlier. _Gavin Reed_. He was smiling, but he didn’t look happy. Connor wasn’t aware people _could_ angry smile before, but here was living proof right in front of him. “I thought you were dead this time for sure, but would ya look at that. Back again.”

Connor didn’t reply, slowly setting down the mug as he stared at him. He didn’t understand where the man’s hostility was coming from, so he felt it was best to wait and see if he could derive any information through what he would say.

“Where’s your partner, huh? Finally had too much of you almost dying on him or something?” 

“I’m afraid Lieutenant Anderson is not feeling well after the incident. I’m only here to pick up files on the case, then I will get out of your way,” Connor replied politely, moving to go to his own desk.

“Ha, wow really? Your shitting me, this is the one that finally broke him?” He didn’t leave him alone, following him to his desk. He was grinning now, a sick amusement on his face. “I knew it was gonna happen at some point but jeez, really? Over _this_?”

“I’m sorry. I don’t think I understand what you mean.” Connor paused before his desk, looking back at Reed. _Finally broke him?_

Reed stared at him, narrowing his eyes slightly and his grin fell away. “Don’t understand what I… What the hell? You know what I mean. Are you fucking with me?!”

Connor’s eyebrows drew together slightly, concerned at the implications he was pretty sure he was picking up from what Reed had said. “I’m not. Is Lieutenant Anderson alright?”

He stared, blinked, before backing up slightly, eyeing him like he didn’t fully believe him when he said he wasn’t messing with him. “Uh, no? He hasn’t been _alright_ since you got fucked over.” He shrugged, looking away with a wave of the hand. “Figures he’d be upset about his plastic boyfriend getting ripped apart again. I told him there’d be a point where you wouldn’t be able to bounce back from but he just always told me to fuck off. Sorry for being _right_ I guess.”

Connor hesitated. _Boyfriend?_ He couldn’t tell if that was a statement meant to make him angry, or if it held truth in it. He thought back to the memory of the picture he’d taken, his hand absentmindedly traveling to the pocket he’d left the wallet in. He frowned, before turning and placing his hand over the computer's screen to collect the data he’d come for. He ignored Reed when he started yelling after him as he left without acknowledging him again. He had no need to continue any conversation with the man, he had a feeling it wasn’t going to get him much further.

He wanted to see Hank. But he had to wait. So the next best thing was to return to Jericho and go through this case’s files. After all, he had no idea when Markus would return, maybe he’d back by the time he got back himself.

The ride back was spent going through the files on the case. It started as a missing person’s case, androids going missing over the course of the last two months. It was spaced out disappearances, enough that it made it hard to find a trail. They eventually did get a lead, thanks to Connor ironically. An abandoned storage facility on the border of the city was the suspected base for their kidnappers, but the details got fuzzy from then on, because that’s when Connor had gone in and ended up getting taken. They’d moved their base, and Hank was the one who pushed hard to find them again no matter what. They found their new hideout within the next few weeks, also finding Connor. It was strange seeing the pictures, he looked… Well, he didn’t even look quite like himself anymore. Torn open chest cavity, an arm missing, half his face was destroyed to the point of being unrecognizable. They’d very purposely not killed him, and it appeared they were taking him apart slowly, a few more pieces each day. They’d caught a handful of the people responsible, three human men. He kept their files open on the side to read about once he’d gone through all the pictures that had been taken of the crime scene. Connor wasn’t the only android there this had happened to, they found others, some far worse off than he was, and a few that were barely even started into this horrible process these people were doing to them. The two others they knew of had escaped, and everyone was still on alert to find them. There was no information on who they were yet, just that one was female and one was male and they seemed like they’d just vanished off the face of the earth after the incident.

Connor came to a picture of himself, propped up against a wall as officers circled around the building, Hank was knelt near him, and another person he didn’t recognize was on the other side of him. He appeared to be a repairs specialist, like Amelia who had woken him up, with tools and emergency backup pieces strewn about them, arms inside his chest cavity they tried desperately to fix the most life-threatening damage.

And there it was, the static again. Connor tried to fight it off at first, he didn’t _want_ to relive this memory, but it was impossible to keep it at bay, and before he knew it, it had consumed him.

 

_Connor hadn’t ever felt so much pain in his entire existence. He’d never felt so out of it either, he couldn’t think. His mind felt like it was dunked in sludge, and trying to struggle out of it only made him sink deeper in. This was one of the only moments he hated he’d gone deviant, because it was a lot harder to control the receptors that allowed him to dull his more human senses. Like pain. It didn’t help he was almost positive they’d damaged some of the wires that connected him to the controls for certain senses, making it literally impossible for him to turn them **off**. He wasn’t sure if they did it on purpose or not, be he wouldn’t be surprised if they did._

_He wasn’t sure if they’d also damaged his control over his ability to cry, so he couldn’t tell if the wetness on his face was his own blood or tears thanks to the pain. The only thing he managed to comprehend was the arms inside his chest, tools grabbing and moving pieces around. It hurt too, but he couldn’t gather enough energy to lift himself and move away from it. Then he felt a hand over his, the one he had left at least, and his head fell slightly to the side to look._

_Hank. It was Hank._

_Hank was good. Hank was safe._

_“You’re fine. You’re gonna be fine-” He could hear him muttering it over and over, and he wasn’t sure if Hank was saying it to reassure him or himself._

_He tried to open his mouth to speak but no sound came out, just a forced metallic noise he immediately hated the sound of, even Hank wincing at it. He shuddered, closing his mouth with as close to a whimper as he could manage. Hank shifted closer, just enough his head could fall fully against his chest. This was better, comforting._

_“I have the vital pieces for his thirium systems back in working order.” The specialist stated. “Closed off the open, bleeding areas. He’s safe to move now, get him back to the truck.” He could hear the man backing up. “We’ll do a forced shutdown so he doesn’t feel the rest of it, and repair the rest of this at the shop.”_

_“Your sure you can save him?” Hank’s voice was tense, dark and serious._

_“Yes sir. We’ll need to buy a lot of expensive replacement parts, but we can get him back together with time.” The specialist assured. He stood, going to get others to help him get Connor up into the truck._

_As he was gone, Hank looked back down at Connor, Connor blinking up at him, trying his hardest to convey how much he cared about him in just a look. He wanted to reassure him, but he couldn’t even move, let alone speak, so the best he could do was just look intently and press his face harder against him. Hank took a deep breath, one hand smoothing over Connor’s hair gently. “You better pull through this, you hear me?” Connor gave his best nod._

_A blonde woman instead of the man came back, wearing what looked like a medical mask over her face. Which was strange, but then again there was a lot in here a human might not want to breathe in, so Connor didn’t question it. The man followed not too far behind with what he’d gone to get. Between the two, they hoisted Connor up, and onto what could best be described as a gurney but for androids. A little harder, more like a portable table than anything. The woman took over once he was on it, he noted now that she was close enough to get a good look at with his damaged vision, she also was wearing shades, face hidden well enough he couldn’t do a proper scan of her face at all. The man said he’d catch up, going back to take care of the other injured androids in the area._

_As the truck doors closed behind them, the woman walked around his table, not yet doing a forced shutdown, which Connor was silently praying she’d just **do** already. Anything to make this stop at least for a bit. She pulled something out of her pocket, lifting her shades to eye it. Connor caught the extremely light blue eyes under them… Unnaturally blue… Wait, was she-_

_“Hey, no hard feelings, but we can’t let you go telling them who we are.” She said, shades falling back down as she paced over next to him. Closer, he could see the item she was holding appeared to be a thumbdrive of sorts. She shoved his head to the side, causing him to jolt because that **hurt**. He tried to struggle, because he was realizing now, she was the girl. She was the one who was with them, and she was an **android** of all things too. He had to get away, he had to tell someone, he had to tell Hank. He tried to scream, and was only met with the same weak, metallic noise again._

_The last thing he knew was her shoving the drive into a hidden port just under his jaw, and his mind was overtaken by static._

 

Connor did scream when he came back to, still stuck partially in the moment of the memory. His hands scrambled against his chest as if it was still open, before one lifted to feel along where she’d shoved the drive in. He was trembling again, but it slowly worsened as the feelings from the memory sunk in, becoming full on shaking. He thought he was going to die in that moment. He thought she was going to kill him. But no, she did something worse. She’d taken away his memory, destroyed his entire sense of self-identity, and _got away with it_.

He jumped with a start when the taxi beeped at him, and he realized it had been sitting outside the Jericho building for several minutes now, waiting for him to get out. Connor lowered his hands, looking down at how badly they were shaking, and tried to calm down. _Think about something else, think about something else_. He went back to the memory of the picture with Hank, he tried to draw back to the light, happy feeling then, and slowly he calmed down. The taxi beeped at him again, and he finally got out, shutting down all the case files for now because there was _no way_ he could deal with it right now. Not after that. Not when he when he could still feel the ghost of pain shooting through him, his open chest cavity aching.

He walked to the doors as he calmed himself, but didn’t enter, heeding Markus’ desires he always stay with someone trusted. He sent out a message to Simon, _I’m back, waiting outside_ , and then stood and waited. Too much had happened today already. Maybe everyone’s suggestions he rest was a good idea after all.

Connor looked up as the doors opened, both Simon and someone he didn’t recognize coming out. It was another male android, and he smiled when he saw him. “Connor!” He grinned, coming forward to greet him. “Ah, yeah you don’t remember me. I’m Josh. I work closely with Markus, just like this guy over here.” He nudged Simon with his elbow playfully, Simon grinning back at him and lightly shoving him with his arm in return. “Sorry I wasn’t there when you woke back up, I was helping finish set up the Jericho cloud. Markus really wanted it ready by the time you got back so I volunteered to take it on while the other three went.”

Connor nodded, smiling and trying his best to hide the fact he was still shaken. “That’s very kind of you. Nice to meet you Josh.”

“Nah, don’t mention it. I just like doing what’s best for all of us, you know?” Josh shrugged, turning to lead the way back in. “Speaking of which, we should get you hooked up. Don’t want to risk an incident like this happening again, right?”

Connor nodded, following. As they went, Simon fell back to walk next to him. “So, how’d it go?”

Connor thought to the ride back, the memory, his still trembling hands. He immediately shoved it away. “It went well. I returned, spoke with my boss, and gathered the files on the case. Everything I was hoping to get.”

“Any more memories?”

Connor’s mouth opened to respond, but he hesitated, and he could see a flash of confusion on Simon’s face when he did. He had the choice to either be honest, or avoid the topic entirely for now. He chose the latter. “I don’t think that’s important right now.”

Simon’s confusion only increased, but Connor was pushing forward to catch up with Josh before he could say anything, hoping Simon would take the hint and leave the topic alone for the time being. They went through a pair of doors to a back room that looked like it might have been a dining room before Jericho moved in. Now it had an entire wall of technology and computers set up. Josh lifted his hands to gesture to it all. “There you have it, everything keeping the cloud up and running. We don’t have any pods set up yet for a manual memory upload or download, but we should be getting those shipped in within the next few days or so.” He clasped Connor on the shoulder, smiling. “You ready to get hooked up to this thing?”

Connor nodded. Experiencing another loss of memory without any backup would be… frustrating to say the least. Now that he knew this girl and whoever her accomplice was were still out there somewhere, he certainly wanted to get a backup started as soon as he could. There was nothing stopping her from showing up again and destroying his new memories just like the old ones. It didn’t take long to get him set up and connected, Josh explaining a lot of Jericho members had already connected to it as well, including himself, Simon, and North. Markus had yet to connect, he was out still. Simon piped in to explain he’d called him to see how long he’d be out, and Markus wasn’t sure, already having had to move on from his original trail to try and find someone else. It could end up being several days unless he got lucky. Connor was okay with that, just appreciative Markus was trying so hard for him.

Once he was connected, the group went all the way back outside just to make sure he remained connected at a distance from the computers. Once affirming he could still connect out there, Connor did a quick memory upload, and turned to Josh to thank him.

“Don’t mention it.” Josh smiled back at him. “We gotta look out for each other, yeah?” Connor nodded in agreement. Josh looked back up at the building, smiling still. He looked happy, proud in a way. Connor wasn’t surprised, he had every right to be proud, Jericho had come a long way from what he’d heard, and if Josh being a part of Markus’ main team was anything to go by, he must have been with it for a long while. “We don’t have all the satellites up top set up yet so it won’t reach everywhere yet. Unsurprisingly, this is a pretty expensive endeavor we got going on. That’s why we had to put it off before.”

“Because of the money?” Connor asked.

Simon nodded this time, crossing his arms as he also stared up at the building fondly. “We kept having to push it further back, Markus was working really hard to get deals with government and Cyberlife to donate to the project. Cyberlife just wanted everyone to reconnect to them at first, but there was no way anyone in Jericho would be comfortable enough to do that.” He looked back to Connor. “He convinced them to let us create it for all of us who’d feel unsafe reconnecting them with your help.”

“With me?” Connor asked.

“Yup. You kinda were a huge deal to everyone at Cyberlife.” Simon sighed, glancing away. “I guess you don’t remember that either, do you?”

“I’m afraid not.” Connor frowned, looking down. “I’m sorry.”

Josh nudged him with his arm, not too unlike how he’d nudged Simon when they first came to greet him. “Hey now, it’s not your fault this happened. Nothing to say sorry for.”

Connor looked at him, and Josh’s expression was genuine, holding a sympathetic kindness to it. He smiled back at him. “Thank you Josh.”

 

The rest of his day was spent with Simon, Josh, and North, who joined them in the penthouse an hour or so later. It was nice getting to know them better. Or perhaps he should say getting to know them again? This was all still so strange, he didn’t know exactly how to go about thinking on it. It was coming together though, albeit slowly, and he felt a nagging in the back of his head to seek out more information, to solve this case. In a way, his entire self was a case to be solved now. He didn’t know who he was, or in the very least, he didn’t know who he _had_ been. He wanted to know, to understand. He wanted to be friends with these people he’d known before again. He wanted to understand everything that had happened between him and them, what he’d done, why he’d done it. He felt drawn to it, drawn to _knowledge._ Just talking and spending time with the group of androids was a great start, quelling some of his desire to understand already. But he knew, deep down, the person he really wanted to speak to again was Hank.

He wanted to understand just exactly what they’d been to each other. Reed’s choice of words still stuck with him. _Plastic boyfriend_. Connor had thought they were just close friends, living and working together, but now he wasn’t so sure. While Connor wasn’t sure how current him felt about that, he wanted to understand how past him became so close to this man. He wanted to know who Hank was better than what little he could gather from looking at his desk, or from what others told him. He wanted to know him _through_ him, not anyone else. He wasn’t sure if it was his curiosity and desire for knowledge speaking, or if it was the draw he felt towards the man, but regardless he still knew he wanted to get to know him.

The only problem, he had no idea how long he should wait before seeing him. Would Hank reach out first when he was feeling ready to talk to him, or was Connor supposed to know when to go see him again? Was someone else, like one of his friends here at Jericho going to tell him when it was the “right time”? He wanted to sigh, because dealing with human emotions just made everything feel so difficult and uncertain. He glanced to the friends around him. Perhaps that was unfair to think, they all experienced emotions too didn’t they? He looked down at his lap… Did he experience emotions…? He remembered feeling them in his flashbacks, but he didn’t know if it was the same now, in present him. He frowned slightly. Should he be concerned by that? He had no idea. He’d learnt about deviants, what it mean to be deviant, thanks to stories the group had been telling while he was with them, and they said he’d become deviant too but…

Was he still deviant…?

He was shaken from his thoughts by North’s voice. “Heyy, earth to Connor!” When he looked up, she laughed. “There you are. Zoned out on us for a second there buddy. Simon just got a call from Markus, he got really lucky and found someone. He says you actually might _possibly_ have met her?” Connor raised a brow. “Kara? Ring any bells?”

Connor slowly shook his head. “No, I’m sorry.”

Simon gave him a small, sympathetic smile. “Maybe seeing her will help…? You might get another one of the memories, yeah?”

Connor shrugged. “Maybe. I haven’t quite connected the dots yet on what will and won’t trigger them.” He looked away, thinking silently for a moment. “I thought it would trigger something when I went to my workplace, but rather it was a picture of me I found there that caused one… I don’t understand why yet, but I’m working on figuring it out.”

North faltered, before moving to stand right in front of Connor, eyes wide. “You had another memory?!” She saw him make a face, and she quickly waved a hand. “Markus told us before he left, he wouldn’t have left us out on information like that, what memory did you get?”

Connor hesitated, he wasn’t sure he wanted to even risk reliving that memory again. “I… It was in regards to the case,” He said slowly, hoping they could understand his hesitance in talking about it.

All of them looked at each other, then back at him, and suddenly the sad stares were back. North’s attitude smoothed out as she knelt before the couch Connor was seated at. She placed a hand over his, which folded in his lap as they usually were when seated. Her eyes were the softest he’d ever seen them. “Did you see what happened to you…?” Connor opened his mouth, but he couldn’t find the right words, so he closed it and nodded. She looked sad, sympathetic. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.” She said gently. “They’ll find those pieces of shit who got away and soon all of them will be behind bars. Okay?”

Connor nodded again, because he didn’t know what to say. He found himself stuck back in his previous conflict. There was so much emotion in her face, on _all_ of their faces, and he found he really didn’t think he fully understood it. He knew what it felt like, that much was evident from the memories he’d experienced, and he knew he really didn’t want to experience the bad one again but…

Connor frowned, and looked away from her face. She must have thought it was a sign of his emotions (that he was starting to think he might be lacking), because she made a soft, sympathetic sigh and stood back up, placing a hand on his shoulder in a sympathetic motion, before stepping away. Simon went to the other side of the room to return a call to Markus, if Connor had to guess to tell him about what he’d just let them know about. North and Josh moved to whisper off to the side, thinking he needed space for the moment. Connor was left to stew in his thoughts. He was struggling to understand all of this. Why was he like this now, when he had been fully deviant before? Where had the raw emotion he knew he’d felt before gone?

His brows drew together, and he brought his quarter back out without thinking to flip it as he thought. He felt like there were only a few places left to look for answers before he’d have to turn to the case, and try to track down the female android who’d done this to him herself.

He would talk to this Kara, see what she could do for him, and then he _needed_ to figure out when he could go seek out Hank. So much of his forgotten past laid with that man, he could feel it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof this chapter wasn't as fun to write as the first one, but it's mostly because I Really want to get to what's gonna happen in chapter 3 pffff  
> I don't have as much to say this time as I did on the first chapter, but like.. WOW. Guys I have never gotten that huge of a response to the first chapter of anything ever??? All of you are so sweet?? Thank you?? I'm absolutely floored, because I just started this for fun and didn't expect a response like this at ALL!! Your all super sweet!!  
> Oh, the rating is being put at M cause I finally decided on it! I have a better idea of some scenes I want to have come up, so that's why! If anyone chooses not to read because of that it's okay ^v^ Thanks for giving it a try anyways!
> 
> If you wanna say hey, my tumblr is: Cylawings
> 
> Please leave a comment with your thoughts, I really love reading them, and I make sure to reply to every single one I get!!


	3. Chapter 3

Turned out it was going to take some time for Markus to get to where Kara was and bring her back, so Connor was left helping around Jericho until the end of the first day. Then during the next as well. He found he liked doing the work, it gave him something to do other than sit, stuck in thoughts he didn’t fully understand, or didn’t feel ready to think about yet. As he worked, he’d finally worked up the courage to reopen the case files, pointedly ignoring the pictures of himself, and instead going to look through the files on the men they’d caught. _Travis Fisher, Dylan Fisher, Jay Pierce_. The first two were brothers, Jay was a friend who’d joined them. From interrogations, they’d really only gotten the sterotypical android hate speech, making this out to be some sort of twisted hate crime against androids. It just didn’t add up though, if they hated androids, why would they work with one? Did they even know the girl was one? Even so, why would she work with them either way? There was something missing, and it was going to keep bothering Connor until he figured it out. Too bad he was now officially off duty until they either got this situation figured out, or there’d been enough time for everyone to feel he had gotten enough “rest time”. Maybe that was for the better. The only downside was, he couldn’t go and interrogate the people they’d caught further. He had questions, so many questions, and they just had to sit inside his mind, waiting. He wasn’t even sure he’d ever get the answers to them either, which was the worst.

The days came and went though, and by the end of the second day of waiting, Markus was on his way back with Kara and her family in tow. North dragged Connor with her to the lobby to wait for them, in the meantime pulling up different designs on her built-in holo-screen and asking Connor his opinions on them. After several rounds of this, he finally asked what they were for. “I wanna get a tattoo,” was the only explanation she gave, before pulling another up.

“Can androids… get tattoos?” Connor asked, wondering if their synthetic skins self-healing properties would get in the way of something like that.

North shrugged, flipping through more designs she had pulled up. “If not, we can figure out a way to make it work. Cyberlife’s putting out all sorts of updates for androids to let them do more human shit, and we’re working on setting up our own android updates for everyone if they don't want to download anything from those assholes. Don’t see why it’d be impossible.”

Connor just gave a small “ah” in response, and let her continue. He did wonder though, “What kinds of updates have Cyberlife been making?”

“Oh you know, stuff like updates for certain droid types who couldn’t feel things like temperature before to make it so they can now. Everyone can get sex upgrades if they want. Kid androids getting an update program schedule that'll allow them to grow up like a human child. They’re trying to work on something that’ll let us eat like humans do too, but that one’s the most difficult, no surprises there.” She laughed slightly, like it was funny, before perking. “Ohh, what about this one?” She held the picture out to Connor. It was a heart, surrounded by roses, thorns wrapped around it tightly.

“I have no opinion. It’s up to you what you like.” He replied genuinely, because he really didn’t have an opinion.

He looked up, feeling what felt like the static again, but it was so small it didn’t even form into a memory. As quick as it was there, it was gone. He frowned. That was… weird. The more the short bursts like this happened, the more he decided he disliked them. They were distracting and not helpful at all to helping him understand anything. He’d really rather be out of it for a minute or two while experiencing something substantial than just feel short bursts of static at seemingly random things, that didn’t even really give him anything. This had already happened a few times throughout the day, and he was beginning to think he’d just have to accept it as a reality of his life until he was fixed.

North stopped suddenly, eyes going unfocused for a moment. Connor could see the LED spinning yellow in his imagination even though hers was removed. “Markus is back,” She said just before the front doors opened, revealing Markus. He had three people following behind him who he was talking to as they walked.

“Oh hey, it’s the Canada people,” North muttered when they came in. Connor quirked a brow at her, but she didn’t explain as they were already approaching.

Connor overheard the tail end of their conversation before Markus noticed him. “-plenty of empty rooms, we can get you set up in no time. Oh! Connor!” Markus seemed surprised, like he didn’t think they’d be waiting in the lobby area for him to return. He looked back over his shoudler at the three entering with him. “This is Kara.”

The female android he motioned to was slim and gentle looking. Formerly a family model, meant for doing things around the house, Connor could tell immediately. He also then immediately questioned why he could remember android models and what they did but couldn’t remember literally anything else. Her hair was cut short and a very light color, to the point where he couldn’t tell if it was bleach blonde or just completely white. Holding her hand was a child, shyly hiding partially behind her leg. She stared at Connor in a way that almost made him feel uncomfortable. Like he was some monster this child was ready to run away from. Then there was easily the biggest android Connor had ever seen standing behind them. He was all synthetic muscle, but didn’t seem threatening, very attached to the two girls he was with. He stayed close by their sides, one hand resting against the back of the child’s head in a soothing motion as she hid.

Kara smiled at him, but even she had a cautious look in her eyes. “Connor, nice to meet you again.” She looked down at the girl behind her leg, fondness coming over her expression. “This is Alice. Alice, say hi.”

Alice stared, shook her head, and slid further behind Kara’s leg. Connor tried to smile at her, hoping it would ease her nerves, but she just completely hid her face at that point. ...He didn't look scary to kids, did he?

“And this,” She smiled warmly, full of a love Connor had seen Markus look at North with before, back at the large android behind her, “is Luther.”

Connor turned his smile to her and Luther since Alice was hiding. “Nice to meet you both. I was told I might have known you, but I’m sorry I don’t remember.”

“Simon’s gonna be disappointed seeing her didn’t work for your memories,” North murmured, smirking and getting up to make space for them to sit with Connor if they chose to. She circled around to stand next to Markus, temporarily closing the screen she’d had her designs pulled up on.

“I heard the stories about Kara when I was asking around about memory loss. She’s the only case anyone seems to have heard of aside from you that lost their memories then regained them,” Markus explained. “Heard it from a group of androids who've gone through a lot of repairs, helped her out once in the house they'd been stuck in. I'm just lucky she was moving back here when I went to look for her.”

“Moving back?” Connor asked.

Kara nodded, still smiling gently. “We went to Canada to be safe during the revolution. When the android updates started coming out, we talked about going back, then we heard there was one that'd let Alice grow up and… Well, there was no room for doubt we should come back to get it for her.”

“It's been months, we figured it's a lot safer now than it had been,” Luther added.

“I'm just glad you feel safe enough to return to Jericho.” Markus smiled at them all. “I'm still so sorry about last time…”

“It's okay, you couldn't have known,” Kara reassured. “We made it, that's all that matters.”

Connor watched the exchange with interest, not knowing the full context of what they were talking about. What he was picking up on led him to believe Kara hadn't been a close friend like Markus and his group had been to him, rather just another follower amongst the crowd. She'd stood out because she wanted to take her family to Canada. Interesting.

“I can talk to him, uh, Luther?” She looked back at him, and they shared a silent conversation. Not like the ones androids usually had in their minds, just a passing of emotions between their eyes. “Can you and Alice get situated in our new room?” Luther nodded, offering his hand, which Alice took, but not before very reluctantly releasing Kara’s.

Markus asked North to show them to an empty room, which she obliged in, leading the pair away. He turned back to them, “Let’s have this talk somewhere else, yeah?”

Connor nodded in agreement, and Kara followed them both as they headed for the elevator to go to the penthouse room, Markus’ room. The ride up was quiet, but full of tension, everyone was thinking hard. There was enough silently stewing thoughts amongst the three of them to fill the silence in a way that made it much more tense than it would have been otherwise. Connor was analyzing Kara, trying to will his mind into giving him something, any sort of memory of when he’d possibly met her before. He got nothing. It was frustrating, just like all of this was. He just wanted to remember things about people he’d known before, it would make things easier. Maybe he’d be able to go solve this case that was nagging at his mind if he just could remember things about people so everyone would calm down and let him work again.

He took note how guarded she was. He realized she was ready to fight , body tensed up like a sprung wound tight and ready to burst at any second. He wondered if she was always like this, or if something had happened to make her this way. Then again, being in an elevator with people you didn’t know very well couldn’t be the most relaxing situation in the world. How well had he known Kara anways? How well did Markus know her?

They stepped out into the penthouse area, Markus leading the way to the couches. Kara looked around before following, not too unlike Connor the first time he came here. He wasn’t sure if she was analyzing the same way he did, there wasn’t and easy way to tell. “This place is nice,” she finally said, smiling at Markus as she went to join them.

Connor and Markus sat on the same couch, Kara chose to sit on the other one. Connor took note of how she put space between them, based off what he’d deduced so far he was sure it was so she had the space to run if she needed to. It put herself out of range for anyone to grab her should she need to run.

“So, you know the story of why I asked you here,” Markus said, leaning back into the couch once he sat. Connor realized he must have picked up on the same things about Kara, Markus was trying to appear as open and unthreatening as he could. “Could you tell us about what happened to you?”

She nodded. “Well, me and Alice hadn't had anywhere safe to stay at the time. So we went to find a man another android had given me the address for, he told me he was safe.” She ran her hands over her thighs, staring down with knitted brows. “I guess it's obvious he wasn't. He tried to factory reset me, so he could sell me. He took Alice and… I don't even want to imagine what he was going to do to her.” A visible shudder traveled through her. “With some help from the other androids he'd, ah… experimented on, I regained my memories.”

“They're the ones who told me about her,” Markus commented. “Ran into them at one of the Cyberlife repair centers, told me about her.”

Connor assumed she already knew who told him abotu her, Markus had just explained for his sake. Kara continued, “It was like my memories weren't removed, just buried under the reset programming. By going through things I'd already experienced, being in places where Alice spoke to me, seeing anything similar to something that had happened to us before, I kept remembering more. Then, suddenly, I remembered all of it. Just out of nowhere.” She looked back up at them. “I don't know if what happened to you is the same Connor, but it sounds similar. Maybe if you can remember enough, it’ll all come back suddenly for you too.”

“So my theory was right…” Connor murmured, leaning back slightly as he thought. “Seeing and experiencing things similar to my past seems to bring up new memories.”

Markus nodded along. “Okay… Is there anything you can suggest Kara?”

Kara didn't reply right away, lips pressing tighter together as she thought. “Well, for me it seemed like the strongest memories came from things that I was emotionally attached to. Like Alice, or remembering fighting off her father…” She met Connor’s eyes when she continued. “I think finding ways to do anything that had mattered a lot to you before, or seeing someone who had mattered a lot to you before, is the best way to go about it.”

Connor and Markus looked at each other at the same time, eyes meeting. They were thinking the same thing. Connor needed to see Hank.

 

They thanked Kara, taking her back downstairs. North was there, waiting to tell Kara where her room was. Kara stopped before she left, bit her lip as she thought over what to say, then turned back to Connor. She placed her hands on his arms, looking him in the eye, serious and sincere. “You can do this.” She lifted her hands away, but added, “If you ever need help with all this, just ask.” With that, she smiled and left, heading for her room and her family.

Markus was quietly catching North up, and Connor wasn’t sure if he should wait or go back to the room by himself. He decided he should wait, pulling at his sleeves sightly in an absentminded tick he hadn’t realized he had until just then. He noticed North grab Markus’ hand, squeeze it lightly as both their skin peeled away momentarily, revealing the white plastic beneath. Markus visibly relaxed, smiling gently at her. He whispered one last thing, and Connor looked away before he saw them kiss. It somehow felt wrong, watching it, even though they were still standing in the middle of the lobby.

He had a feeling if he could, he would have jumped in surprise when Markus’ hand landed on his shoulder. “So. I think we need to visit someone.”

“We do.” Connor agreed.

“Tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow.”

 

 

The night came and went. There was something stirring in Connor’s chest he wasn’t sure what to call. The hollow feeling was back, but it wasn’t that. The draw towards Hank was surging through his mind, stronger than ever, but it wasn’t that either. It was something that made his entire body tingle, his chest feel too tight, and prevented him from properly resting. There was nothing wrong with his systems, aside from the obvious errors he got whenever he attempted getting at the old memory files again, so the only thing he could think was… He was nervous.

It was odd, _feeling_ things like this sometimes. He had been questioning if he was still deviant, and now he was certain he was, at least partially. In a way, he felt a bit of denial in him at the thought of going full deviant again, if only because he remembered what the pain felt like. The tears. The fear when that woman had come towards him and he couldn’t even scream for help.

Connor aprubtly stood from the couch he’d been trying to rest on, and took to instead pacing back and forth across the penthouse room. Markus wasn’t there, who knew what he was up to. If Connor had to guess he was catching up properly with his friends and checking up on Jericho projects after his absence while finding Kara. He wondered what she was doing right now as well… Sitting with her family? Tucking Alice into bed? Talking to Luther? And Markus, he could see in his head… The night he’d spent with North, Simon and Josh, except instead it was Markus with them, not him. Chatting, laughing, working together.

The hollowness felt worse somehow.

Connor felt… _lonely_.

He felt a new reason emerging in his mind for the strong desire to get back his memory. He wanted to remember his place again, how he fit in, who it was that he spent his time with so much, the person who mattered so much. Just like Luther and Alice to Kara. Just like North, Simon, and Josh to Markus.

Well. He already knew the answer to who that was he supposed. What he wanted was to remember _why_.

 

 

The tingling feeling got worse the next day. His chest so tight he was actually _glad_ he didn’t have to breath, because if he did he was sure it would be difficult thanks to the tightness where his lungs would be. Markus was going with him, vigilant as ever when it came to sticking by Connor’s side through all this. Connor was pretty sure Markus was nervous too, he could see it in the way he fidgeted in the taxi seat beside him. They didn’t talk while heading there, a tense, uneasy silence was all that was shared between them.

Connor wondered if he should be worried about this. He didn’t know much about Hank, he had no idea what to expect from the man from what little he’d gathered about him. He wanted to ask Markus, but the silence was heavy during the drive, and he didn’t want to disturb it. Markus was thinking over how this could go just as hard as he was, he could see it on his face.

Seeing the house when they got there was… weird. Connor could feel the static, but it didn’t overtake him. It was there, at the back of his mind, buzzing like an annoying itch that wouldn’t go away even if you tried to scratch at it. This was worse than actually experiencing the memories, he hoped it’d just figure itself out and give him something soon so it’d stop buzzing distractingly in his head. Markus led the way. Connor almost thought he should be the one going first, but Markus already beat him to the door, knocking loudly three times.

They were met by barking, the sound of a dog thudding across the ground to approach the door. The barking continued, and continued, but there wasn’t any other sound. Connor and Markus shared a look, before both split in opposite directions to check the windows. Connor could see nothing very substantial from the window he went to. He could see the tail end of Sumo at the door, tail wagging as he continued to bark up a storm. The rest of what he could see was empty, no Hank in sight. He could see the couch from there though. The couch fromwhere they took the picture. 

He stumbled back from the window with a wince as the static suddenly amplified, hands coming up to grip his head. “Connor? What’s wrong?” He heard Markus, but he couldn’t see him, eyes squeezed shut. It was so loud, but nothing was _happening_. Where was his memories? Why weren’t they showing up already? This wasn’t how it went the other times, _why_?

It finally died back down, still not giving him anything except a headache, and he realized Markus was holding him by his shoulders. “I’m… fine.” Connor forced the words out, Markus frowning at the blatant lie. “I’m fine,” He said again, as if that’d somehow make it true. “I saw something familiar and my head filled with static.”

“A memory?” Markus asked, eyes lighitng up with hope.

“No… It didn’t give me anything.” Connor frowned as he saw the hope in those mismatched eyes flicker out. “I don’t know why, it usually gives me something when it does that. I’m sorry.”

Markus didn’t reply at first, jaw clenched, shoulders tense. He looked worried, nervous, and sad all at the same time. “It’s fine…” He looked back at the house. “I don’t think he’s home.”

“We can’t see the whole house from here, he could be-”

“His car’s gone.”

Oh. Connor wasn’t sure how he missed that detail, but Markus was right. There was no car parked here, which implied Hank was indeed out somewhere. “What now?”

“Well, guess we gotta play detective a little don’t we?” Markus had an amused tone at the joke, and Connor even smiled a little. “I’m actually glad he isn’t here,” Markus said honestly, sighing as he let go of Connor finally. “If he’s going out to do things that’s… at least a little better than what I expected.”

Connor’s brow knitted together, frowning. “What did you expect?”

Markus looked at him, lips parted slightly, eyes wide, like he’d just realized Connor still didn’t remember everything. “It’s… not important. Let’s find him, okay?”

Connor narrowed his eyes at him slighlty. He hated when people weren’t honest with him. He hated when he could tell they weren’t being honest, and he knew _they knew_ he could tell, and they still wouldn’t tell him. His mind flashed back to Reed’s words, about how this was the one that finally “broke” Hank. He didn’t like those implications. He didn’t like the implications that Hank being home alone was a bad thing. He didn’t like any of this.

Markus said they should start checking bars nearby first. Connor just allowed himself to be led along, busy stewing in his thoughts. Was he upset at Markus for lying to him? Maybe. Was he going to confront Markus about it? No. At least not right now. He knew really, Markus was just trying to protect him. What was the point in protecting someone who couldn’t remember everything anyways? It’s not like he remembered Hank, and it wasn’t like his deviancy or emotions were fully intact again yet. His emotions would be fine, regardless of whatever Markus told him. It frustrated him. Emotions frustrated him. People trying to protect him frustrated him.

Connor was just… frustrated.

They went through several bars, each one Markus would ask the bartenders if they’d seen Hank. He didn’t even show the people a picture of the man, but most seemed to know who he was referring to regardless. Hank must go to bars a lot then. They eventually came to one, a sign was scratched out on the door, though Connor could still deduce it had originally been an anti-androids sign. Figures. Markus stopped outside the door, also staring at the sign with an angry expression. He shook it off soon though, looking back at Connor. “This is where you two first met,” He warned. Connor nodded, understanding the warning. If his mind didn’t just overwhelm with static and give him nothing again, he could get a memory here. He remembered the short memory of introducing himself to Hank here, wondered if he’d get that again but expanded. He hoped so, he’d like to remember how their first meeting went.

They walked in, not without many stares shot at them, though more were aimed at Markus than Connor. People recognized Markus often as the android revolutions leader, and as the still-standing leader of Jericho. The reactions were different all around, some looked angry, some looked away with a huff, a few looked at him in awe, as if they were seeing a celebrity walking in. In a way, Markus was a celebrity he supposed.

He could feel the static itching in his mind again, but nothing was coming yet. “I’m going to look around,” Connor murmured to Markus, moving past as Markus went to ask the bartender if he’d seen Hank. Connor paced the small area, looking for anything that would bring up a memory. He saw the exact spot he’d first met Hank in, and it was like he could see the same memory replaying behind his eyes. It wasn’t enough. He went to the bathroom.

It was weird, seeing himself in that mirror again, but also feeling like this was the first time he’d been here even though he knew it wasn’t. He adjusted his tie, nearly out of habit than anything else. He got another replay of himself, adjusting the tie, but it wasn’t anything new. Great, this was a fruitless effort then. With a frustrated huff, he went back out. The last thing he saw was the tables people were seated at, before the static slammed through him out of nowhere.

 

_They were here. At a table, with other coworkers. Chris was there, a female officer too that Connor couldn’t seem to recall the name of. He could scan her he supposed, but he didn’t feel like it. He was too busy listening to Hank, telling what he called one of his “horror stories” from doing work. They usually weren’t all that scary, more so weird circumstances one wouldn’t have expected, or cases that turned out to not be nearly as big or serious as they thought. Currently he was explaining a time they thought these kids were missing, turned out they’d been hiding in a treefort in the woods with a bunch of stolen food._

_“You shoulda seen the looks on their faces when a bunch of officers showed up at their little hideout,” Hank was chuckling, holding a half-empty bottle in his hands. “Little shits learned to never scare their parents like that again for sure.”_

_The girl was laughing, “Oh my god. And you guys were looking for them for the whole week?”_

_“Yup. It was terrible. We started thinking they were kidnapped, but nope. In the woods being idiots.”_

_Connor didn’t totally understand the humor in the story, but he listened attentively anyways. He liked listening to Hank talk. Liked watching him talk. Liked him. He liked Hank. It was a weird thing, liking someone so much. Hank had told him he was like a teenager with a crush when he’d described how he felt, he remembred it clearly, and he wondered if that was really a bad thing. Was it bad to like someone so much you couldn’t stop thinking about how happy you want to make them? He just wanted Hank to be happy. He wanted to help Hank be happy. Hank made him happy…_

_“Hey, are you guys still going on that date?” Chris asked, taking a sip of his own drink._

_“Not a date,” Hank grumbled. Connor’s heart sunk a little bit at that but he smiled anyways. He may have told him his feelings, but he never quite told Hank who the feelings were for. It was… hard._

_“Yes, he said there was a concert next week and I can go with him.” Connor was so happy Hank agreed to let him come. He had said he wanted to listen to more of Hank’s music, and he wanted to learn more about anything Hank liked. These concerts was something Hank liked, so Connor wanted to like it too._

_“Aww, you two are adorable,” The girl cooed, giggling when Hank just flipped her off._

_Chris tried to hide his amused smile behind his glass, asking instead, “Connor, what are you gonna wear?”_

_“Wear…?”_

_“Well I don’t think showing up to a metal concert in a suit is very fitting.”_

_“It isn’t?” Connor asked, genuinely confused._

_The girl just started laughing harder, “Oh my god, Hank you really got a cute one, holy shit.”_

_Hank glared at her. Once she had been sufficiently glared at, heglanced at Connor with a shrug. “I have plenty of shit you can wear. Or we can buy you something. Whatever you want.”_

_Connor’s heart skipped a beat at the thought of wearing something of Hank’s. He nodded a little more excitedly than he should have. “I don’t mind borrowing clothes if you need me to!”_

_It was Chris’ turn to start laughing. “Are you sure he’s not your boyfriend?”_

_Hank rolled his eyes, tone pointed and sharp when he replied. “No, he’s not.”_

_Connor’s chest hurt._

 

Connor came back to, and realized he’d fallen to his knees on the floor. Markus was kneeling in front of him, eyes wide and searching. A few other people were staring, but they kept their distance. “Memory…?” Markus asked quietly.

Connor nodded slowly, the static still dying down, it was hard for him to see straight as it still clouded his vision. Markus helped him up, pulling him along with him to get him back outside as quickly as he could. As soon as they were alone out on the sidewalk, Markus took Connor by the shoulders again. “Connor, talk to me. What happened?”

Connor took a moment, hands coming up to rub over his chest again. This memory had hurt too, but differently. It hadn’t hurt the way the physical pain had, but in a way, this felt worse. This pain was something that persisted, with no foreseeable end. His heart… Hurt…

“Oh… Connor…” Markus sounded sad, and before he knew it Markus was hugging him. Connor realized with a start, he was crying. He hugged Markus back, just to find someone, anyone, to ground him as he tried to calm down. Connor’s hands fisted into the back of Markus’ shirt, hiccuping on a sob he had tried to keep down. Markus’ hands were soothing, rubbing along his back in reassurance. “Please talk to me, what did you see?”

Connor took a breath, sucking in air to try and get more cool air to the systems in his face to help calm down. “I saw… It was Hank. He doesn’t… I don’t…” He couldn’t talk, mind and heart still stuck in that moment. It was like he’d forgotten he wasn’t that version of himself still, that this wasn’t him just seeing Markus outside the bar after the moment happened.

Markus seemed to realize though, leaning back to look Connor in the eye. “Is this the memory of when he said he didn’t like you?”

Connor blinked slowly, the shock almost winning over the pain. “How did you…?”

 

“You talked to me about it when it happened. You cried like this then too.” Markus smiled sadly, sympathetic. “You were pretty emotional as a deviant, huh?”

Connor almost could laugh at that, a sad smile tugging at his lips. “Apparently.” Slowly he came back to himself, and it was like he could _feel_ the disconnect between current him and the him of that memory forming, like a chasm splitting open between himself and who he should be. It felt wrong, but he couldn’t stop it. In a way, he wasn’t that Connor anymore, was he?

It felt stupid to have cried now, feeling so disconnected from the moment. He wiped his eyes with his sleeve. Why were androids built to be able to cry anyways? _I could cry to trick people into sympathizing with me_ , the thought popped up out of nowhere, but his surprise didn’t last long because it made sense. Doing his work could require any sort of emotional manipulation, if he needed to fake cry to earn someone’s sympathy, he was built to be able to. Jeez. What was he _not_ able to do?!

“We need to find Hank,” He finally said, just wanting to get away from the moment. Despite the disconnect he felt, his chest still hurt, and he was hoping refocusing on their mission would help him get away from the feeling.

He was nervous though. With each new memory, it felt like more and more of his deviant self was re-emerging, his emotions coming back with it. He really didn’t know what to expect from Hank now. He guessed he got his answer though. They weren’t in a relationship like he’d thought.

But Connor had loved him.

 _God_ , had he loved him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one took a bit longer to get out, sorry about that guys!!  
> Funny enough, it ended up being too long for everything I was excited to get to to fit in it, so rip! I guess look forward to me getting to include that in the next one ;)  
> I was excited to get to bring Kara, Luther, and Alice in, and this won't be the only time they show up !! So don't worry, they arent just having a single-chapter appearance. It might take some time though? I'm not sure yet. So when they show back up will be a surprise of when it is!!!
> 
> Pretty please leave a comment with your thoughts! I love reading them, and they inspire me to keep writing, even if its something short and simple !! <3
> 
> If you wanna say hey, my tumblr is: Cylawings


	4. Chapter 4

Connor and Markus gave up their search soon after Connor’s newest memory. Markus said the last bartender had only seen Hank the previous day, and that didn’t help them at all. There weren’t many more places within a reasonable distance to check, so they headed back to Hank’s house. He _still_ wasn’t there when they came back. At least Sumo wasn’t barking anymore.

“Would it be creepy of us to just wait for him here?” Markus asked.

“Probably,” Connor said with a sigh. He looked to Markus. “I have an idea of what we could do in the meantime. Maybe he’ll have returned once we finish.”

“Oh?”

“I want to gather the files on old cases I’ve already solved. Maybe if I can go through them I can find more memories?” Even though the idea was a good one, he felt weird about it. Nervous, tense, uneasy. He hadn’t exactly had the most pleasant experiences with his memories coming back the last few times. But what else was there to do? He wanted to solve his mission already, it was what he was built to do.

...Wait.

Was this…

“Markus?” Connor asked, hesitant. “Am I acting different?”

Markus’ brows knit together. “Are you acting different?”

Then, in the back of his head, he had the quick thought, _if he knows it will be detrimental to the mission_. “Nevermind. I think it's just nerves.” He even offered a small smile to ease the other androids worry.

Markus frowned, patting his shoulder. “Let's see if we can get the case files for you.”

It was weird, existing on this line. Connor wasn't sure what to consider himself anymore. He felt emotions, but it wasn't the same. He had programming that would randomly pop back up and dictate what he did, but it wasn't the same. He was on a line, in the weird blurry area in between deviancy and programming that he was pretty sure hadn't existed until now because of him. He felt emotions, he felt his programming, he wanted to complete his mission, he _wanted to talk to Hank_.

Was the world really just against him? It felt like the universe didn't _want_ him to see Hank. Or maybe, it didn't want him to remember. Either way, it sure seemed to be keeping everything he'd wanted just barely out of his grasp.

They almost weren't let in when they came back to the precinct. Got stopped on the way in by one of the newer androids working there. Or well… Connor got stopped. Apparently everyone was told he wasn't supposed to work again yet, and if they saw him were told to tell him to go home. Then Markus stepped in, and the android realized with wide eyes who exactly was _with_ Connor. She let them through without another word after that, Markus thanking her as they went.

A few other people gave Connor half hearted “aren't you supposed to be at home?”s, but he ignored them, making a beeline for his desk. He scanned over Hank's as he approached. Nothing had been touched, he hadn't been here. Well, it'd been worth a shot, even though it was unlikely he'd have been there.

He placed his hand over his computer, sifting through files and tugging out the ones he wanted. He was glad he hadn't seen Reed when he came in, he didn't want to deal with him again. If anything, just to spare Markus from the man's unreasonable hostility. “I've got everything I need, let's go.”

They got out just as quickly as they'd come in, and Connor silently thanked the stars it was that easy this time around. They found a bench nearby and went to sit so they could flip through cases. Connor didn't open them all at once, eyeing over them briefly each to decide which were most important. Markus helped him sift through, making small comments on the few Connor pulled aside to open up. It was strange to see all these things he’d apparently helped with, but have no recollection of them. It felt wrong almost. Should he be looking at these? Was he really _that_ Connor still? He shook the thoughts off, opening the first one, a case of an android murdering it’s owner, way back before the revolution even began. He could feel the static but nothing overtook him. Figures, if his regaining of memories was emotions based, he wasn’t exactly attached to Hank yet during this case, this was one of their first cases together.

He pulled up another, an investigation apparently nicknamed the “pigeon incident”. Checking out what seemed to be an android who was thought to be in hiding in the area, in a rundown apartment overrun by pigeons. They did find him, and proceeded to try and chase him down. Apparently they failed at catching him because he tried to push Hank off the side of the building, and Connor stopped to pull him back up. Connor winced, feeling the static crackle in the back of his mind harder. This was familiar then, it was getting closer to what he wanted.

The next was a case of Eden Club robots murdering a patron while in a room with him. He noticed Markus look away when he came to this case file, he almost asked why, then he realized. North. _Oh_. He kept his mouth shut, going through the file while Markus kept his gaze trained away. His gaze looked steely, the angriest Connor had ever seen him, even if the anger was only shining from his eyes. The rest of his face was very neutral, guarded as if trying to keep the feeling contained.

In the case, Connor and Hank had found the trail to follow the escaped Traci, only to find out there were two of them, and ended up in a huge fight. Connor tensed when the static worsened, and suddenly he was thrown back.

_He was holding a gun to them, a war inside his mind happening. He could shoot them right now, succeed in his mission and take them in. He could shoot them. He **should** shoot them. He should, he knew he should, he could feel Amanda’s pressure inside his mind to do it, but… His hand fell. He made eye contact with the blue haired Traci, and she nodded her head in a silent “thank you” before both turned and ran._

_Even while talking to Hank he could only pay partial attention, his mind stuck in it’s conflict. Why had he let them go? There had to be a reason, a logical reason. He didn’t **do** things unless they were logical. So there had to be something, **something** to why but-_

_“Maybe this was a good thing we did here,” Hank murmured, staring off in the direction the pair had disappeared into._

_Connor looked at him, uneasy, eyes searching. If Hank thought it was better they let them escape… Maybe that was enough. Maybe that was all the reason he needed. He could still feel the pressure in his mind, urging him to change his decision and go try to chase the Traci’s, but he didn’t. Hank told him they should head out, and he followed him without a word. He didn’t know why._

_But maybe… that was okay for now._

 

He came back with a jump, eyes widened. He shared a look with Markus, began to open his mouth to speak, only to cringe as the static worsened again. The last thing he saw was Markus’ eyes widening in concern before it overtook him again.

 

_He was out walking Sumo when he saw them again. It had been about a month and a half since the case, but he recognized them immediately. The Tracis, in casual clothing, LEDs removed, walking down the sidewalk hand in hand. He almost crossed the street to avoid running into them, he didn’t want to make them uncomfortable, but… Then they saw him too._

_“Oh, it’s you,” The one with blue hair said, slowing down slightly. The brunette didn’t speak, but her eyes did widen a bit in recognition._

_Connor opened his mouth, but no words came out. He didn’t know what to say. What did someone say to the people he’d aimed a gun at a month ago? Hi sorry for almost shooting you? “Hi,” was all that finally came out, voice small and awkward. Sumo, never one for reading the mood well, simply tugged against his leash as he approached the girls, tail wagging in greeting._

_They looked down, and the brunette started giggling, letting go of her lovers hand so she could kneel down and pet him. “He’s so cute. We need to get a dog Kate.”_

_Blue hair sighed a long, drawn out sigh, crossing her arms. “I don’t think we have room where we live right now for any pets Lily.”_

_They changed their names? Interesting. Connor shifted uneasily, though when it seemed neither were about to try and scream at him, he spoke up, “Sumo’s pretty big, I’m certain you could find smaller dog breeds if you’d like.”_

_Lily’s face lit up in joy, looking up at Kate with large, round pleading eyes. Kate rolled her eyes skyward, groaning. Connor couldn’t help the smile that came to his face. They kinda reminded him of how he and Hank acted a lot, one always intrigued or excited, the other rolling their eyes and groaning. “We have to talk to Markus first, are dogs even allowed in the building?” She looked back at Connor, seeming to only then realize he was still standing there. “Oh uh… Hey, I want to say… Thanks for letting us go back then.”_

_Connor’s smile turned sad, but he shrugged. “It was the right thing to do.” He glanced at Lily, face being licked by a very joyous Sumo, laughing as she only half-heartedly tried to fend him off. He hadn’t known why he let them go before, struggling between his budding deviancy and his programming, fighting against Amanda as she tried to push his programming onto him harder than she ever had, but now… Now he knew why. It was the right thing to do. He didn’t want to hurt them because they were just scared and wanted to run away so they could love each other in peace. “Are you two living at Jericho?” He asked, changing the topic away from the heavy one._

_Kate nodded. “Markus is… honestly the kindest man I’ve ever met. And I’ve met a **lot** ,” She laughed slightly, but it held a certain bitterness to it, a very obvious reference to what she formerly was forced to do. “I can see why North stays with him. He’s good to her.”_

_Connor smiled slightly. “He is.”_

_“So, what have you been up to? Moved on from what you were forced to do before too?” She asked, looking to him again._

_“Ah… No, not really.” Connor laughed awkwardly. “I actually really enjoy doing my job, it’s a lot nicer to do it without my programming trying to make me make bad choices though.” He glanced down, pulling slightly at Sumo’s leash when he tried jumping up onto Lily, but she just squealed in joy despite almost getting knocked over. “I love working with Hank too so… There’s enough positives I don’t see any reason to leave.”_

_“Ah, that’s fair.” She looked down as well, sighing again, before leaning down to help pull Lily to her feet. “We’re looking into jobs now. I’m a bit interested in police work, making the world a better place and all that.” She shot him a grin. “If I go for that, put a good word in for me, would ya?”_

_“Will do,” Connor replied honestly, smiling._

_“I want to work with plants!” Lily announced excitedly. “Or animals. Both? I really love both.”_

_“Markus is really busy but he and his team are helping us look for openings we can go for,” Kate explained with a shrug._

_“Well, I’ll keep my eyes open as well.”_

_They both smiled. “Thank you.” Kate linked her arm with Lily’s again. “It was good to see you again Connor. If you ever need anything… Well, you know where we live now.”_

 

The static ended again, but it was still there, strong, clouding his vision. Markus was asking him if he was okay, and he blindly reached for him, trying to speak. He had no idea if his words were coming out or not. He wasn’t expecting this at all. He never expected to get two at once, but already he could feel a third coming along. He tried to tell Markus he’d be fine as his vision cut out again.

 

_He was in their room at Jericho, he’d visited them several times before and they’d started forming a friendship. The former Tracis were actually really nice company. This was the day before the concert he was going to with Hank. Hank had offered to take him clothes shopping, but he said he wanted to try something on his own and surprise him. Hank just shrugged and let him go. He went to see Kate and Lily immediately, because they “knew their shit” about clothes (their words not his). They’d actually just got back from clothes shopping, laying out the different outfit choices they’d put together for him. There were a few piles of their choices on the bed, and before he knew it he was being shoved into a side room to change into what they decided he should wear to the next day’s concert._

_When he came back out, both of them cheered, Lily a tad more enthusiastically than Kate, but he’d learnt she was far more energetic than Kate so it wasn’t any surprise. They’d found a t-shirt for the band Hank likes, black with the red logo plastered right over the chest, paired with black skinny jeans with faux rips along the thighs that didn’t actually rip all the way to the skin, but still added to the aesthetic of the look. He felt weird out of his suit, but their enthusiasm was helping him feel at least a bit less awkward._

_“Hold on, one last thing,” Kate said, hopping up to approach him. She ran her fingers through his hair, messing it up on purpose, before stepping back. “Hahaaa, there you go. You look super fuckable now.”_

_Connor laughed, though he wasn’t sure if it was more so from how awkward he felt or not. “It’s not like I’m trying to… Y’know…”_

_Lily placed her chin in her hands, elbows resting on her knees as she gave him a sympathetic pout. “Ohhhh you poor baby, your in denial!”_

_He was almost positive he was blushing, but tried to hide it by turning to look in the bedroom mirror. He did think he looked… interesting? Certainly like he’d fit in at the concert. He glanced back at them, letting his anxiousness show on his face. “You don’t think Hank will find it weird do you…?”_

_“Honey, he’s gonna love it,” Kate reassured, seeming pretty positive for someone who hadn’t ever talked to Hank herself before. “If you don’t believe me we can call the others right now and have them take a look at you too.”_

There was a period of static, cutting out part of the memory, when it came back it seemed a bit later that day.

_“Holy shit, Connor!” North exclaimed as soon as she saw him, spinning in her seat away from the table they were all sitting together at. They’d been told Markus’ group was just hanging out in a former dining area downstairs while Markus worked on boring paperwork stuff. They’d gone down to see them, Kate contacting North to tell her Connor needed opinions on an outfit. They and North got along very well thanks to a similar, bad past they could bond over._

_“That’s what I said!” Kate laughed._

_Josh was grinning, “You look great Connor.”_

_Simon wasn’t sitting in a chair, sitting on the edge of the table. It was a bad habit he’d picked up from Connor. “Oh wow!” His eyes were wide, rounding out as he looked Connor over. “Jeez if you weren’t already into someone I’d be all over you.” He got a shove from Josh and almost fell off the table, both breaking down laughing as Simon playfully kicked at him in return._

_Connor glanced away, laughing awkwardly again. “Thank you guys…”_

_He glanced up as Markus stood, leaving his papers a moment as he approached him. “You have nothing to be nervous about,” He reassured, placing his hands on Connor’s shoulders. The physical touch was grounding, comforting in a way the words weren’t. He met Markus’ knowing gaze, knowing exactly what he’d talked to him about before. “It’ll all go okay.”_

_“Worst comes to worst, you call us and we’ll beat him up!” North declared, grinning._

_“Please don’t beat up Hank,” Connor said with a slight frown, because he knew she was being completely serious._

 

 

Connor finally came back to, the static fully fading away this time. He sucked in a gasping breath, just wanting to feel something in the moment rather than the weird mix of emotions he just received from the memories. He realized suddenly he was leaning against Markus, apparently he fell over onto him during the memories. He sat back up straighter, eyes unfocused as he tried to sort through the _three_ memories he’d just recieved. Holy hell. It was overwhelming, too much at once. Kara said he’d get _everything_ back at some point. He was actually scared at the thought, afraid of what it’d feel like. Would it be overwhelming like this was? “Markus,” He managed weakly, not looking at him, “Where are Kate and Lily?” If he’d become friends with them, why hadn’t they shown up when he woke back up? Where were they while he was working at Jericho again now?

“Oh. They moved out a few weeks before the incident… They don't know yet.” Markus said slowly. Connor felt one of his hands on his shoulder, squeezing slightly. “Are you okay? Are they all you remembered…?”

Connor finally looked at him, he could see uncertainty in his eyes. He didn’t answer his question, instead he asked, “What happened at the concert?”

Markus visibly faltered, not expecting that question. “I… I don’t know if I’m supposed to tell you things like that Connor. Maybe it’d be better if you remembered for yourself, I wasn’t even _there_ -”

“ _Markus_.” His tone grew harder, more tense. “What happened?” Curse his mind for not giving him a memory of the concert during that dump of memories.

Markus was visibly conflicted, eyes growing pained. “Connor I… I don’t want to tell you.”

“Why? Because it was bad?!” Connor didn’t mean to sound angry, but his emotions were severely kicking up now after the memory dump, hand curled into fists against his legs.

“What? No I just-”

“Why do you keep avoiding telling me anything?!” He forcefully shrugged Markus’ hand off his shoulder, standing before he spun to glare down at him. “Whatever it is, I can take it! It’s not gonna hurt me any more than those _people_ who did this to me did!”

Markus stood, lifting his hands in resignation, trying to show he didn’t want to have a fight. “Connor, where is this coming from…?”

“You keep avoiding telling me anything, even when you say it isn’t a bad thing! What are you trying to do?! What are you hiding from me?” Connor’s nails were digging into his palms, something so small but he found he could still feel it. He didn’t spend much time thinking on it, stuck in his swirl of emotions.

“Connor…” Markus sounded thoroughly upset, voice low and sad. “I didn’t mean to upset you. I just… I’m _scared_ Connor. I’m scared of doing the wrong thing.”

“Oh really?! You, scared? Of what, ruining your _amazing, perfect_ reputation?” He didn't mean that. Why was he saying that?

Markus winced, just slightly. “No! I just…! Connor, I’m scared of doing the wrong thing with you!” His hands fell, curling into fists at his sides but not in anger like Connor. He was stressed. “I’m scared if I do something wrong, we’ll all lose you forever!”

“You haven’t lost me I’m right _here_!” Connor yelled it, frustrations and emotions bubbling over. “I’m not gone, I’m here, and I see how you all look at me! I notice when you won’t be honest with me! I just want to feel normal, I want to see people I was friends with and just be friends again without-! Without _all this_!” He gestured vaguely between the two of them.

Markus frowned, starting to step towards him, “Connor…”

“Leave me alone.” He turned away from him. When Markus didn’t leave right away, he repeated it, “ _Leave me alone_. I need to be alone for awhile.”

There was a long silence, and finally Markus murmured, tone so sad it almost broke through Connor’s angry resolve, “Okay.” He walked away and Connor was left alone. Alone with his thoughts. Alone to come down from his emotional high. He didn’t know what to do with himself, so he just started walking.

He felt like he was thinking a lot while walking but also not thinking at all. Like all the emotions were turning his head to mush. He didn’t like it, it just made him more mad and frustrated than he already was. He wasn’t even really paying attention to where he was going, he just walked and walked and walked. It helped, at least he felt like it did. He didn’t get tired, or really experience what it felt like to exercise, so maybe it was a psychological thing rather than a physical one. Where humans could walk to blow off steam because it helped get their physical energy out, it just helped Connor to be doing something instead standing still and getting suck in his thoughts.

He didn't realize until he was feeling calmer how long it'd been. It was getting dark now, the sun setting somewhere on the horizon he couldn't see. He also realized with a start, his feet had carried him all the way back to Hank's house. No wonder it was so much later, it can't have been a short trek to get back here on foot. He ran a hand back through his hair, a habit he wasn't sure when or where he picked up. Even when he wasn't paying attention the draw towards Hank was still pretty strong, huh?

He glanced around, only for his heart to stop as he realized, the car was back. _Hank_ was back. He felt stuck in place, for only a moment, then suddenly his feet were carrying him to the door. He could check the windows again, make sure someone was actually in there, but he didn't want to freak out Hank before they even got to meet again. He lifted a hand, hesitated for a split second, then knocked. Sumo barked, but he didn't hear anything else. He was about to knock again, louder, when he heard an all too familiar voice. “Agh, Sumo shut up!”

Sumo obeyed, falling silent, though Connor could just see it in his head, the dog waiting excitedly by the door, tail wagging. His mind was growing static-y at the thought, but he fought against it. _No. No, no, not right now, I want to see him_. 

The door opened and… There he was. He looked mad at first, like he was expecting to tell off some salesman, but then his expression faltered. Suddenly he was staring with wide eyes, just as frozen as Connor was. Connor wanted to speak, but he couldn't. It was like a moment frozen in time, both staring at each other and waiting for the other to do something first. Connor didn't even look down at Sumo when he bounded up to him, happy as can be. His eyes were stuck on the man in front of him.

“Hank…” He finally murmured, voice quiet. Hank’s jaw worked for a moment, like he wanted to say something but couldn't find the words. Connor finally just asked, “Can I come in?”

It took a moment, but slowly Hank moved to let the door open wider, and Connor stepped in. He recognized this place but also didn't. It was a weird feeling to have as he looked around, scanning best he could through the static clogging up his head. He looked back at Hank as he closed the door.

He didn't care about anything else in that moment, the hollowness inside his chest _finally_ dissipating when he looked at him. Hank. He finally found him.

“Hank, I-” was as far as he got before wincing, hands coming to his head.

“Connor? Are you okay?!”

Connor stumbled, making sure he reached the couch so he wouldn’t have to worry about falling against Hank, or worse, Sumo. He didn’t want a repeat of coming back from memories just to find out he’d fallen over onto someone again. “I’ll be fine,” He forced out as fast as he could, “Just give me a second.”

It was different this time, a series of mini-flashes rather than long concrete memories. He saw himself walking Sumo, walking with Hank as they walked Sumo, he saw a flash of them on the couch when he took the picture, they were at the bar with their coworkers, at work together working after hours, he saw Hank in a band t-shirt with wide, enraptured eyes trained on him as his heart beat too fast, he saw Hank above him, thirium staining his shirt as he held Connor, he could see Hank trying not to cry in the hospital room. It was just Hank. Hank, Hank, _Hank_.

He came back, eyes wide, and it was still Hank… Hank looking out for him, Hank worrying about him. Nothing felt concrete, everything felt mushy and swirly, but there was one thing he kept thinking. _I love him. I love Hank. I love Hank, I love Hank_. It was the only thought that mattered. He looked up at him from where he’d stumbled and fallen back onto the couch, and offered him a small smile. It seemed to be enough to reassure him, relief flooding his features. “What are you doing here? And what the hell was that?”

Connor sat up straighter, but he could feel everything in him as if it was brand new, like it'd just reawakened. His emotions were so strong it almost hurt, his heart beating hard enough he could feel it when he rubbed a hand over his chest. “It was memories… Sometimes I blackout for a bit when they come back.” He looked at Hank, looking at his blue eyes. He missed those eyes. Missed them…? Was he finally remembering enough that he felt like he was himself in his memories, or was this just another “in the moment” feeling? He didn’t know. He didn’t care. “I missed you.”

Hank didn’t know how to reply, Connor could see his heart rate jumped when he said it though. “Shit… And… You. How much do you…?” He trailed off slowly.

“Not everything,” Connor replied honestly. “I’m missing a lot, but I remembered enough to want to see you again.”

“Jesus,” Hank sighed, just sitting down next to him now. A tired sadness came over him as he ran a hand over his face. He wouldn’t meet Connor’s eyes directly. “Do you have somewhere to stay tonight or…?”

Connor could see the offer veiled by the question. He thought of Markus, then thought of how he’d yelled at him and his chest twisted uncomfortably. “Not really.”

“Not Jericho?”

“I yelled at Markus a few hours ago. I think it’d be better if I didn’t come back there just yet.”

Hank’s eyebrows raised in surprise, he shook his head with a weak chuckle. “Fuckin’ hell Connor, you’re the only person who could yell at someone like that and get away with it.” He glanced at him finally, and seemed hesitant, speaking slowly like he was testing the waters of what Connor remembered. “I guess you can stay here then… It is your house too after all.”

Connor smiled slightly. “Our damn house…”

“What was that?”

“Nothing.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THEY FINALLY MEET AGAIN!!!! The moment we've all been waiting for!!! Aprubtly cut off by the chapter's end cause I'm sooo nice like that hahaa. (Sorry this one's a teeny bit shorter than usual also btw)
> 
> I've been waiting to introduce Kate and Lily and I'm so happy I finally got to them aaaaa! I really am trying to reference as many in game characters as I can, within realistic measures, and I already know how several more people you guys have yet to see will be included >:3c
> 
> I'm excited for them to come in too, but it's gonna be a bit~ 
> 
> Please leave a comment with your thoughts!! I love reading them, and they inspire me! I'll make sure I reply to everyone too ^v^
> 
> My Tumblr if you wanna say hey: Cylawings


	5. Chapter 5

To say he and Hank's reunion was a little awkward at first was an _understatement_. Connor was happy to at least see Hank seemed to be doing… really well actually? There was still an air of sadness around him and sometimes he caught him looking at him with this uneasy look, but Connor could live with it. He was just happy to be here for now. He finally paid Sumo attention when the dog shoved his head in between his legs where he was still sitting on the couch, earning a laugh from both him and Hank. “Yes, I missed you too Sumo,” Connor cooed, scratching behind his ears, earning Sumo’s tail thumping against the ground as he leaned his head into his palm.

“Well… Shit, I uh, was going to eat, didn’t really expect anyone to be showing up here…” Hank mumbled, turning to look back at the kitchen area, bags sitting on the counter. Had he been out grocery shopping? Was that why he’d been out when Connor had been here earlier?

“Could I help? I feel bad showing up without warning,” Connor asked, genuinely a little sorry he didn’t even try calling first. He knew Hank’s number, he’d caught it on one of Markus’ screens before.

“I uhh… Sure…?” Hank agreed slowly, awkwardly. “It’s not a lot, just basic stuff, you know.”

Connor left Sumo by the couch, standing to follow Hank over to the bags. He was surprised. He hadn’t gathered Hank to be a person to really go out and buy things at least somewhat healthy. He almost asked then decided against it. He was a detective, he could figure it out on his own. Later. He just wanted to focus on helping for the time being, already having intruded by showing up unannounced. Hank didn’t seem to really mind his sudden appearance that much, he wasn’t angry at all. He did seem tense, but Connor couldn’t blame him. Connor felt tense as well, but only because he was nervous about how this would all play out. Hank very obviously wasn’t sure how to act, not sure how much Connor remembered, and Connor wasn’t sure how to properly approach the subject.

So instead, he just helped put away groceries and pick out what to help Hank cook. It felt right, like it wasn’t the first time he’d done this even though he couldn’t remember if he'd actually done it before.

“So…” Connor finally decided to try and breach the silence, just to get them started on talking about _something_. “Have I done this before?”

Hank glanced at him, and Connor tried to ignore how much the pain in his eyes hurt to see. Maybe he should avoid talking about anything on what he did and didn’t remember for now… But it was an important discussion to have. He just hoped Hank would be more honest than Markus had been with him. Hank didn’t seem like the kind to get as worried as Markus had been getting about what he was allowed to say. In Connor’s mind, there was no “right” thing to say, he just wanted honesty.

“You have. I’ve tried to tell you not to, but you don’t listen to me ever.” Hank laughed a bit at the last part, though it sounded tinged with sadness. He shrugged. “It’s alright, I don’t mind the help. Just don’t like feeling like I’m forcing you back into the android stereotypes.”

“But… I was built for detective work. It can’t be-”

“We’ve had this exact discussion before, you know?”

Connor stilled, before nodding, and returning to focusing on what he was doing. Well that didn’t go well. “I’m sorry,” He finally said, voice soft. “I really want to remember everything but I… don’t.”

Hank heaved a heavy sigh. “Don’t say sorry, you didn’t do shit.” 

They didn’t talk again until Hank was seated to actually eat, but he wasn’t doing a great job. Just picking at it while Connor sat waiting patiently on the other side of the table. “So what do you remember?” He asked, setting the silverware back down as he resigned himself, accepting he just wasn’t going to eat a lot tonight.

Connor perked at the question, happy to answer because at least this time it was Hank starting the conversation. “Well, I remember we lived together. I remember this,” He pulled out his wallet, picking out the picture so he could slide it across the table to Hank. “I read through the files on cases we’d done together.” He contemplated a moment, adding, “I remember I was going to go to a concert with you, but I don’t remember the concert itself. Then many short flashes of various things, nothing very concrete though.” He frowned, looking down at his hands on the table. “I wish I remembered more. I’m working on remembering but it isn’t easy.”

“Hm.” Hank didn’t reply, staring down at the photo Connor had slid to him. He seemed distant, asking without looking up, “So it’s not fixed yet?”

“No, I’m s-”

“Don’t fucking say sorry again, christ.”

Connor’s mouth shut with a click of his teeth at that. Hank ran a hand back through his hair, eyes finally tearing away from the picture to instead stare blankly at the wall. He wasn’t quite there, his mind was somewhere else. Connor wished he could see where his mind was in that moment. “I remember when you found me,” He added after the moments pause, tone soft. He tried to suppress the memories of how much pain he'd been in, focusing only on the parts where Hank was there. “You were the only thing that made me feel calm at that moment.”

That got Hank to look at him, but his eyes were still dark, clouded over by something Connor couldn’t put a finger on.

“I remember… what happened,” He continued slowly. “The woman, she… She was an android, she corrupted my memory files.”

Hank sat up straighter, eyes widening. “What?”

“I hadn’t said it because I felt it was important to keep it confidential until I could tell someone I worked with.” In truth, he was scared of reliving the experience via his memories if he accidentally triggered it again. He didn’t want to feel what he’d felt in that memory ever again. “I couldn’t scan her face, but she was blonde, and her eyes were blue. Too blue, like she got replacements that were lacking in the realism most of our eyes are given-”

“Connor, what the hell?!” Hank cut him off, he looked like a whirlwind of emotions all at once, angry, shocked, relieved. “How long have you remembered this?!”

“Several days…?”

“And you didn’t think to go tell anyone?!” Hank sounded more angry than anything else now.

Connor winced slightly, looking away. He could make the argument he had nobody to tell, but that was a lie. He’d been to the precinct after remembering and didn’t say a word to anyone. He shouldn’t be dishonest, this was Hank, he had trusted Hank before right? He could trust him now… Right? “I was scared,” He admitted quietly.

“I- What?”

“I was… scared.” Connor repeated, hands tightening into fists against his lap. “I was scared of the memory, I didn’t want to think of it. I’m sorry I should have said something sooner regardless, I just…” He trailed off. He had no excuses. He really should have told someone and he was only just now realizing how important it was that he get the information to someone who could use it to help. Emotions really did blind you, didn’t they?

There was a long silence, but finally Hank let out a long, tired sigh. “It’s fine. Don’t worry about it. We’ll go get the information turned in tomorrow, yeah?” He slumped back in his chair, looking up at the ceiling. “A fucking android… Why would an android do that to other androids?”

“I don’t know,” Connor murmured, equally as perplexed as he’d been the first time he realized. “It’s not impossible for deviant androids to experience symptoms akin to mental illness, perhaps she’s suffering from it?”

“God, a mentally ill android serial killer. _Great_.” Hank pushed himself to his feet, taking the plate of food he’d barely eaten back to the kitchen, obviously deciding he just wasn’t going to eat more tonight. “Any idea on her accomplice?”

“The one who escaped? No. I don’t remember seeing him at all.” Connor stood and followed, pausing at the edge of the kitchen, watching with a frown as the food went to waste.

“And… Mentally ill androids? Happens how exactly?” Hank asked, putting his plate once it was cleared in the sink, not bothering to wash it.

“I…” Connor opened his mouth to reply when he suddenly realized he didn't know. He wasn't sure how he'd even known as much as he'd said, it was like it'd just come out automatically and now he was thinking about it he had no answers. “I don't remember…”

Hank frowned at him, though it was sad and sympathetic, Connor felt bad. He was supposed to be able to help with all of this. “How about we just give the case talk a rest. We can talk to Fowler tomorrow and see if he's got any files for us. Okay?”

Connor nodded, though didn't meet Hank's gaze because he felt almost… ashamed by his inability to assist. But Hank had said they'd not talk about this any further, so he tried to think of something else. “May I make a weird request?”

Hank actually laughed at that. “When are you _not_? Shoot.”

“Can you play the music we had heard at the concert?”

Hank looked him over, face twisted in confusion. “What?”

“I was hoping hearing it would trigger more memories. I’ve found experiencing or seeing something similar to what I’ve experienced before helps them come back to me.” He explained, hands fidgeting slightly because he was still _nervous_. He thought the nervousness would die down while he was here but he seemed to only get more and more anxious the longer this stretched on. It was in the way Hank looked at him, distant and sad and tense. He didn’t like that. He wanted the face he remembered only flashes of, happy and calm and _smiling_. How was he supposed to make Hank happy? Wasn’t him being here again enough?

“Oh,” was the only response Hank gave to his explanation. He ran a hand back through his hair, then walked away, back into his room for a moment. He came back with an old-style ipod for music, handing it off to him. “Here, go wild.”

He vanished into the backroom after, mumbling something about feeding Sumo. Connor eyed the device given to him over, before moving back to that familiar couch to sit. He steeled himself for whatever may happen, memories or not, and put the earbuds in.

His mind's reaction was immediate.

 

_He was standing nervously before a **very** shocked Hank. It didn't seem like a bad kind of shock, more like he was… in awe. Eyes wide, mouth just slightly agape, staring at him like he was some unreal ethereal being. Connor shuffled uneasily, not used to feeling so strange under the stare of someone else._

_“Holy shit Con,” He finally breathed out._

_Connor glanced down at the outfit Lily and Kate had helped him pick out, feeling especially weird with his hair not perfectly kempt as it usually was. “Is it… Good?” He asked hesitantly._

_“Good? Connor are you serious?!” He wheezed slightly, averting his eyes despite his tone. “If I knew you'd be dressing up like this I'd have tried a little less.”_

_“What, why?” Connor was genuinely confused._

_“You're gonna have everyone's eyes on you, I'm as good as invisible next to this,” He waved vaguely at him, laughing slightly._

_Connor frowned, huffing defiantly. “Hank, you look good too!”_

_“Flattery won't get you anywhere Con.”_

_“I'm serious!” He insisted, but Hank was already walking away towards the car. “Hank!” He ran after him, putting on his best angry pout. “Why don't you ever believe me when I say you look good?”_

_“Because I don't,” Hank scoffed. “Come on, in the car. I don't want to continue this discussion.”_

_“But-”_

_“Connor. Drop it.”_

_Connor knew when Hank meant it when he told Connor to drop a topic, and he **really** meant it right now. Didn’t make Connor any less upset over it, but he shut his mouth and got in the car._

It got blurry there, the car ride and beginning of the concert forgotten amongst static. When it came back to giving him a clear vision of the memory…

He was _kissing Hank_?! What? Just as quick as he saw the flash of it, it was gone and the memory was over. It left Connor staring at the opposing wall, eyes wide, eyebrows drawn together in confusion. He didn't.... How did-??? He groaned, wrapping his arms around his own head as he closed his eyes. He was confused. He was _really_ confused. And that memory didn't help it just made him _super confused._

He jumped when Hank spoke, having come back from feeding Sumo. “Con? You okay?”

Connor whipped around to face him, tense and unsure. For the first time in awhile, he felt extremely out of his league. He didn't understand, had they been together? The bar memory had been before the concert, so perhaps Hank hadn't meant the things he'd said. But then again with only the flash of the concert in his mind, he couldn't be certain that wasn't an accident, or that he'd instigated it and it wasn't reciprocated, or even that Hank had been too drunk to make sensible choices.

“Uh… Connor?”

Connor was shaken from his thoughts by that, blinking up at Hank. “Sorry, I just…” He glanced away, down, then moved to turn and sit properly on the couch again, facing away because looking at Hank right now just confused him more. “It's late. We should rest and talk tomorrow.”

Hank didn't say anything for a long moment, but in the end didn't push it. “Alright, well, if you need anything…” He trailed off, before sighing and disappearing back into the house towards his room.

Connor heaved the heaviest unnecessary sigh, pulling his legs up on the couch with him just to hug them to his chest. He was confused. He was conflicted. He didn't know what to make of all this anymore. It seemed his previous conclusion was now obviously false, and he'd have to go back to trying to figure out what exactly his relationship with Hank had been. He let his face fall against his knees, hugging his legs tighter. He hated this. He didn’t like dealing with confusing emotions and just as confusing memories he couldn’t fully remember.

He wasn’t sure how long he stayed like that before a wet nose pushing against one of his hands shook him from it. He lifted his head to see Sumo there, wagging his tail slightly when he looked at him, eyes looking at him inquisitively. He could have sworn Sumo could tell he was feeling conflicted and had come to check on him. He smiled, lifting his hand to rub Sumo’s head. “At least I know what I was to you, huh?” He murmured softly. He ended up patting the seat next to him, Sumo happily lumbering his way up onto the couch to lay with him.

He let himself go into sleep mode (basically just a low power mode with a nicer name slapped on) sitting like that, Sumo’s head resting against his lap, one of his hands idly rubbing over the dog’s ears as he drifted off.

 

Connor woke up far earlier than Hank, though that wasn’t a surprise. Androids didn’t need to “sleep” as long as humans did. He certainly could just go back to resting until Hank woke up, but he decided to make himself at least a bit useful while waiting. Sumo woke when he moved, lifted his head to look up at him, tail thumping against the couch. Connor smiled, running his hand over his head. “Thanks for staying with me Sumo,” He said, hoping Sumo could understand how thankful he really was. “How about we find your food?” Sumo seemed to understand that, already getting up to get off the couch in excitement.

It wasn’t hard to find where Hank kept the dog food, on a shelf above the dog bowls. Connor was struck with momentary sadness, realizing he must have used to feed Sumo when he woke up early like this all the time. He was shaken from it by Sumo bumping his leg with his muzzle, reminding him he promised the dog food. He laughed softly, kneeling down to fill his bowl.

He stayed there as Sumo ate, sitting on the floor beside him and running his fingers through his fur as he contemplated everything that had happened to him since he woke up from his memory loss. The memories he’d had. He found himself going back to the girl who was responsible for this, thinking about her face, her voice. Something about it was so frustratingly familiar, but he didn’t know why. He had no memories of any female androids with long blonde hair like that. He’d met Kara sure, but Kara’s hair was short, and she’d been in Canada until the day he met her anyways. Had he known an android with blonde, free flowing hair like that before? Hm… He would bring it up with Hank when they headed out for the precinct.

He didn’t know what to do with himself, so he busied himself by simply following Sumo around until Hank woke up. It wasn’t very exciting, after eating Sumo had simply gone and laid down. So Connor ended up sitting next to him, watching as he dozed off. He heard Hank before he saw him, bedroom door opening and closing as he came out slowly.

His hair was a bit messy, he was running a hand over his face as he grumbled to himself all the way to the kitchen. He turned on the coffee machine on the counter, before just leaning back against the counter and rubbing his eyes. Connor pushed himself to his feet, going to stand at the edge of the kitchen in wait. Hank jumped when he opened his eyes and saw Connor there, swearing in surprise. Just as quickly he calmed down though, surprise replaced with that weird slight sadness he seemed to constantly be in with Connor’s presence. “Shit Connor, you scared the hell out of me.”

Connor smiled apologetically. “Sorry.”

Hank waved a hand, dismissing his apology before he stood up straighter, stretching his back as he waited for his coffee.

“So, when will we head out?”

“What?”

“For the precinct. So I can supply the information from my regained memories.” Connor explained simply.

Hank nodded then, slowly. “Right… Right, that.” The machine dinged, and he turned towards it. “Speaking of memories, uh… remember anything last night?” He asked with a hesitant voice, like he was uneasy about what the answer would be.

Connor wasn't positive what that meant. His mind automatically came up with possibilities, perhaps Hank knew he could potentially remember the kiss and didn't want him to, or perhaps it was the opposite, Hank knew he could remember it, wanted him to, and was nervous because he wanted to know if he did or didn't. “Perhaps that's a conversation for the car ride,” He gave as his reply. He wasn't sure why he put it off like that. Maybe he was nervous too.

Hank eyed him over, the unease visibly only growing on his face at that response. He didn't say anything else, just finished making his coffee before going to his room to get dressed. Connor only had to wait a few minutes before he'd come back out, regular white shirt, jeans, and a coat over it all that Connor had seen more than once in his memories of Hank. He must wear the coat often.

Hank led him out, having to tell Sumo “no, we're not going for a walk, go lay down” before they were out the door, but before long they were in Hank's car and headed out. It felt familiar too, being in this car, and he could feel the crackling of static. It didn't take over this time, it wasn't even terribly strong. In a way it was simply soft white noise he soon was able to tune out. He was getting better at that he realized, tuning the static out when it wasn't actually helping him in any way.

He remembered his previous statement, of talking about his memory when they were in the car, but Hank hadn't said anything yet. He almost didn't want to, maybe if Hank didn't bring it up he wouldn't have to approach the topic. But… He also didn't want to be dishonest with Hank. That sharp pull inside his chest towards the man was still there, and it wasn’t about to let him try to treat Hank badly at all. “Hank?” He forced the words out. “What were we?”  
He could see Hank’s hands tighten around the steering wheel. “What?”

“What were we?” Connor restated the question, though his voice was just as tense as Hank had sounded. God, neither of them knew how to approach this topic. “In my memories of the concert, I didn’t get much but I… I just want to know, if we-”

“ _Connor_ ,” Hank’s voice cut him off. His voice sounded tight, strained by emotion that was hard to give a name to. “We were… Something.” Connor could hear how hard it was for him to force his words out, but he was trying. He was a little concerned about Hank’s death grip on the steering wheel, but he wouldn’t dare try to speak up while Hank was still struggling through his own words. “Fuck, Connor, I have no idea what the fuck we were. We just were _something_.”

This was looking more and more like Connor may have been correct in his assumptions that the kiss wasn’t accidental, his previous suspicions were never wrong, and that all of his nerves were well warranted. What was he supposed to do knowing this now? He could feel that uncomfortable disconnect, even despite feeling the pull towards Hank, he didn’t know if that still translated to… Whatever it was they’d shared between them. “Hank I… I don’t know if I can-”

“It’s fine,” Hank certainly didn’t _sound_ fine about it, but at the same time he sounded like he seriously wanted to drop the subject. Connor decided it was a better idea to not touch on it again for now. Maybe it was better to just not talk about it again ever. Or… at least until he had himself and his own emotions better figured out again.

They fell into a tense, awkward silence the rest of the drive there, and Connor just stared out the window the entire time. He didn’t want to look at Hank, because he was afraid what he would see on his face. Hurt, pain, anger, sadness?? None of it? _All_ of it at once? Connor didn’t want to have to see any more negative emotions on his face, especially not when he now felt even more responsible for them than he already had before. They didn’t even say anything to each other when they got there. They just got out of the car in silence. Connor didn’t like this, but he didn’t know what he could say to improve the situation. It was probably better to just leave it and follow Hank’s lead as they headed in. 

They got all sorts of looks and glances, but at least nobody tried to stop Connor from going in this time. He had to guess they saw him with Hank this time, and nobody would stop the pair from going in if they were together. Maybe it was like an unspoken understanding if they were going in with each other, everything was fine now.

Well, everything was _far_ from fine, but nobody here needed to know that.

They barely had even walked in before Fowler saw them. He had been talking to another officer outside his office when they came in, a conversation that abruptly ended as he yelled across the room. “HANK, CONNOR! MY OFFICE _NOW.”_

Hank grumbled something about “just got back” and “what a welcome” but did as told, heading towards his office. Connor followed, wondering if it'd be an issue he was back, talking to Fowler again, so soon after last time. 

“Thank _god_ you're both back. Please tell me you're here to say everything's fixed and you two can work again.” He didn't even greet them, going around his desk to sit down. He had a file in his hands, after a quick scan over, Connor realized it was the file on their most recent mission. The one where he'd even gotten messed up like this in the first place. Great. 

“Wouldn't say much is fixed, but I'm fine,” Hank grumbled, still sounding extremely not fine, but Connor didn't know what to do about it. He sat down in one of the chairs as well. Connor hesitated, then followed suit. “We're here because Connor remembered something important.” 

That sent both pairs of eyes looking at him. Connor realized quickly they wanted him to explain. “Oh, yes. I regained a memory of the women who caused the disturbance within my memory files.” He lifted his palm, skin peeling away as he projected a screen to show snapshots of his memory of her. “She's not human, she's an android and appears to have replaced her eyes with some non-brand model. It's entirely possible she or someone she was with made the eye replacements she has, though I have no way of telling if they do anything for her or were simply replacing damaged parts.” He flipped forward to a good shot of her holding the device she'd shoved into his neck. “That is what she plugged in that caused my memory errors. She also briefly spoke to me, I can attempt upload a sample of her voice to one of our computers.” 

When he finished he was met with a long silence. Then Fowler groaned, placing his face in his hands. “It's a fucking android, great.” He shoved the file across the table to them. “Yeah well this case just got a whole hell of a lot worse.” 

Hank gave him a questioning glance, before opening the file up. Right on top was a new report from the previous night. There was already a new victim, but this time, they were human. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I FINALLY UPDATED AGAIN THANK HECK.
> 
> Sorry it took so long, a lot happened, hopefully I can get back on a schedule of getting this out faster again now though.
> 
> I hope you guys enjoyed! Please leave a comment with your thoughts, I love reading them, and they inspire me to keep writing!! Also I do my best to reply to every single one! Thanks for reading <3
> 
> My Tumblr if you wanna say hey, see me reblog too much hankcon art, or see my random posts about this fic as I work on it hahaa: Cylawings


	6. Chapter 6

“Fucking hell,” Hank murmured as he read through the report. “I thought they’d only gone after androids?”

“I know. This also doesn't match up with their previous pattern at all.” Fowler’s arms were crossed, his expression tight with stress. Connor started wondering if he’d been up all night thanks to this. He looked tired.

Hank passed the file off to Connor, who was able to easily and quickly scan over everything. The report had come in right around midnight, there were pictures of the scene attached. It was gruesome to say the least. The human wasn't nearly as destroyed physically as the androids they'd attacked were, but that could either be because there was only two of them, or because humans just could not survive as long as an android could. It was still just as terrible to see, bloody and unnerving. “We really need to catch them,” Connor murmured.

“Yeah, no shit,” Hank grumbled back. “Are we allowed to go check the scene out?”

Fowler frowned slightly. “Are you both sure you’re ready to go again?”

Hank didn’t say anything, just looked over at Connor. Connor realized, he wanted to know what Connor would say first. “Yes, I am ready. I would like to catch this girl, I want to understand what she’s done to me and how she did it.”

Hank nodded along, shrugging as he looked back to Fowler. “If he’s ready, I’m ready.”

With a long sigh, and a “okay then”, they were given an official welcome back and placed back on duty.

 

That’s how they found themselves at the crime scene within the hour. There were policemen stationed everywhere to keep any of the public from getting close, but they parted to allow Hank and Connor through when they showed up. Hank walked away to go up to some man Connor didn’t recognize, but the guy was also carrying some files, so Connor just had to guess he had all the information so far on what had happened. Connor didn't follow, more interested in getting a look at the scene. They'd moved the body, only an outline remaining in its place, but he had snapshotted the pictures in his mind from the earlier file so it was fine.

The area was at the edge of the city, within a fairly empty, very rundown town area. A lot of poorer folks lived out here, and there was never much activity. Made sense they'd be able to get away with leaving a victim just out in the road like this. Connor did feel bad for whoever found the body, the pictures were gruesome and gory. Stab wounds across the chest and stomach, slashes through the neck, a beaten face. The poor man… Connor hoped he’d passed on quickly during these people's attack.

While wandering the scene, he found several items left with markers by them, signaling them as important. One was a message left in the road around the body, written out in what was supposedly the victim's blood. **_Different, Different, Different._** It was written too perfectly to _not_ be an android, but that news wasn't new. Now it was a matter of what did it mean?

The android did have “different” eyes, though that seemed very minor for that to be what she was referring to. Not to mention, they still had absolutely no information on her accomplice, which meant it could be referring to him. Maybe it was referring to them both? Couldn’t be certain what “difference” was being referred to though.

There was a brief moment of static, recalling a similar crime scene… But this was inside a house, **_I AM ALIVE_** written on the wall above a stabbed man. Just as fast as it had come upon him, it was gone, but Connor could easily piece together it was a case he'd been on with Hank before. He remembered reading it when going through their old files. That was another case of a seemingly mentally ill android, though in that case the android had retaliated against long stretches abuse, while this… this was very different.

The pattern stopped making sense as soon as the human victim happened. Maybe there was no pattern to begin with. Maybe androids had just been easier targets originally when they were working with the humans who hated them. There were too many questions left unanswered to come to any very clear conclusions.

“So, what’re you thinking?” Hank appeared by his side not too much later, hands shoved into his coat pockets as he surveyed the words on the pavement before them.

“I believe this is pointing even more to a mentally ill android,” Connor stated. “Messages left with victims like this is just… not normal.”

“Anyone killing anybody ain't normal,” Hank grumbled.

“Fair,” Connor agreed.

“They've been talking to everyone who lives in the area. Nobody's seen shit according to what everyone's said.” Hank sighed. “This isn't helping us at all.”

Connor frowned. “Hm… Nobody woke up to any noise?”

“Nope.”

Connor stroked his chin thoughtfully. “So the victim was killed elsewhere and left here perhaps?” He looked over to Hank. “They must have somewhere they're staying, within reasonable walking distance from here. They took care of their victim elsewhere then brought the body here on purpose so people could find it.”

Hank seemed to understand where he was going with this, nodding along. “We should start searching in all directions from here then.”

Connor nodded once. “Precisely. Any area where a tussle with a victim could have occurred without being noticed is where we want to check first and foremost. We find nothing there, we can start checking the buildings. There's nothing to say they couldn't have avoided a fight by knocking the victim out.”

“Alright. I'll get the word out, and we can choose a direction and go.”

Connor watched him walk away to speak with the man he'd talk to before. All their previous tension seemed to forgotten, at least while on the job. It was nice that at least there was _something_ they could do together without letting all the weird tension between them weigh it down. Soon enough a few groups were heading out, and Hank and Connor were walking down the main road away from the crime scene. It was silent between them as they went, but for once it wasn't a silence brought on by their awkward inability to talk to each other.

The town was strangely quiet as they went, to the point Connor would have questioned if people actually lived in this area if it wasn't for the cars parked in driveways. There was nothing of interest for the first ten minutes or so, but the further they got, the more the houses started to dwindle, turning slowly into just a road with trees framing it on all sides. There was nothing out of place, and the only real building Connor could make out in the distance was a factory, but it was too far to be of interest.

“Do you really think they could be anywhere out here?” Hank asked, slowing a bit as he glanced around at the trees surrounding them now.

“Hm,” was Connor’s only reply, busy scanning the area. There certainly wasn't anything that pointed to anyone being out here, but at the same time the woman _was_ an android. It was entirely possible she knew how to cover her tracks against someone like him if she was smart enough to think ahead. “Just a little further.” He looked to Hank. “If there's still nothing we can go back.”

Hank sighed, but gestured for him to continue on. Connor didn't say anything else already going ahead. It was very quiet then on, they falling back into silence together as they went. Connor kept scanning everything around him, trying to see if he could pick up anything, even as the trees grew thicker around them. Honestly, when he tried to think too hard on how he knew how to do all this still it just confused him, because really he didn’t _remember_ at all. He had a feeling it was just his original programming taking over as he did it without him having to think too hard on it. It didn’t matter really he supposed, as long as he could help try and catch these people.

Connor perked when he caught what looked like a building tucked away in the trees. “Hank I think there’s a-”

He was cut off by Hank yelling in surprise, the audible sound of a scuffle breaking out. He whipped around in time to see what appeared to be another male trying to grapple Hank, having come at him from behind. How had Connor not seen or heard him coming?! 

“HEY!” He yelled, starting forward to rush to Hank’s aid.

He didn't get very far. He heard the bang before he felt it, a bullet hitting him right in his neck. It was followed quickly by a second bang, hitting the side of his chest. He stumbled, still mid-step, and fell to the dirt. “ _CONNOR_ -” He heard Hank yell.

He couldn't look at him, he couldn't move his head, stuck staring straight up as red warnings flashed across his vision. They warned him repeatedly of his neck, a wound bleeding far too much and far too fast, saying to remain stationary and try to stem the flow. He lifted only one hand to press against it, and his fingers were soaked by wetness within seconds. This was bad. This was very, very bad. His LED pulsed red in time with his heart, hammering in his chest in what becoming too similar to the memory he’d had that was just raw pain and fear, when Hank had found him. Right before the woman had taken his memories from him. He tried to force it away, force the now raging static to the back of his mind. He didn’t want to be overtaken by fear right now, it would be detrimental to saving himself and Hank.

A weak wheeze left him when a foot stomped on to his chest, the same woman standing over him as from the memory he was trying to suppress. She had no sunglasses this time, but her lower face was still covered by the half-mask. Those piercing, uncanny blue eyes stared down into his as she aimed her gun at his face. There were no words, just both of them staring at each other, gazes intense and silently projecting different emotions to the other. She looked angry but sad at the same time. Connor realized she had not cocked the gun to shoot again.

Something about this was familiar. Too familiar. His mind spun with another surge of static.

_I don't want to kill you_. He could suddenly hear a females voice in his head.

_I don't want to kill you either_. He responded. Maybe if he could talk her down this would end far better than it had started. _Please put the gun down._

She didn't move or respond, eyes simply scanning his face. She looked away only a moment, to the side where Hank and the other man should be. Connor couldn't hear any more scuffling and his chest tightened at what that could mean. She looked back down to him. _I told them not to hurt you, you know. I didn't think we'd catch you. I didn't…_ There was another long pause. This was taking too long. His warnings were now flashing a timer at him and it was increasing his panic more, ruining his attempts at shoving it down. _I just wanted you to forget. I want everyone to forget. Then nobody will remember we're different._

_What do you mean?_

She didn't answer. _I won't kill you. Consider it me returning the favor. Just stop trying to follow us after this. Okay?_

Connor's brows drew together. _What? Returning the favor for what?_

She was already walking away though. “ _You_ ,” She was speaking aloud to the side now, at he could only assume Hank, “give us your gun and don't follow us. We'll let you save him.”

There was a stretch of silence. Connor saw the timer fall to two minutes. He needed to be calm and pray they didn't shoot Hank too if he didn't listen. Connor carefully lifted his other hand, removing his tie and using it as a makeshift bandage to his neck, trying desperately to buy himself extra time.

His mind was spinning again. The static wouldn't leave now and the bloodloss certainly wasn't helping any of his processors function for him. He couldn't think straight, too much going on in his head at once.

He somehow made out Hank's face past the warnings, his hands, fabric much larger than Connor's tie pressing against his neck. Distantly he registered, “No, no, fuck, not again, fuck, fuck-”

“H...ank…”

And then he fell away, spiraling down into a buzzing, static-filled abyss.

 

_“I'm just saying we shouldn't mess with this one!”_

_“Oh and why the fuck not? We got lucky, it's real popular with all these plastic shitbags, it'll be a great one to send a message to em with.”_

_The man and woman had been arguing in the other room for awhile now. Connor could hear them clearly, and though he'd contemplated trying to escape, he knew there was no way his legs would function for him right now. He was at least glad the woman was arguing for his safety. Being a well-known android had its perks he supposed. He glanced to his legs, broken beyond function. It also had its downsides…_

_“Why do you fucking care anyways? It's not like anyone will find us.”_

_“I don't think **you** understand. We're gonna have the entire police department **and** Jericho onto us now we have Connor! We release him back to them and maybe we'll get away with our lives.”_

_“Oh right and just let it go blabbing to the police about where we've been hiding. Great idea Aurora.”_

_“I swear to god, Jay, do you want do die because if we get caught with him we are dead-”_

_Hm. Aurora and Jay. He at least had two out of five names now. All of them were smart enough to wear masks so his scanner couldn't properly identify any faces. He was positive this was a crime fueled by hate and the firm belief that androids weren't "real”, going off what he'd heard most of them saying. The only one that didn't fit was this Aurora. She actually called androids by their proper pronouns, she used their names, she seemed to have a far better understanding of androids than the rest. It just didn't feel like it added up. Best he could tell, she just the wanted mechanical parts and tech._

_He didn't know why she couldn't just go buy it instead of participate in these crimes. All technology used in androids was offered in plenty of stores now._

_There was also the mute one, who was a curiosity all his own. He was very jittery, prone to jumping in surprise at any noise slightly louder than normal, fidgeting with his hands when he was nervous. He always stuck close by Aurora when Connor did see him, hovering near her side like some sort of loyal dog. He couldn't tell if he was mute naturally or just wasn't talking around their victims._

Static rushed past, obscuring whatever came next in the memory. It rushed through his mind, like a harsh river, rocking and splashing, flashing glimpses of so many different things but not falling into any particular one for some time.

The next memory began with the feeling of a gun being pushed into his hand.

_He remembered Kamski’s words, the sweet, honey-covered tone he had as he told Connor to shoot if he wanted his questions answered._

_He remembered Chloe, knelt before him. The way her eyes locked onto his when he looked at her. Her gaze was intense, and despite her outward act of no emotions, he could see something swirling in those blue irises. A silent plea, begging him not to-_

_He handed the gun back in a jerky motion, eyes unable to unlock from hers, hands shaking. He only looked away when Kamski claimed he was deviant. He had been in denial, saying he wasn't as quickly as he could._

_He remembered Hank's face when Connor admitted he'd looked into Chloe’s eyes and not been able to shoot. He seemed proud._

_He remembered her eyes again. The unspoken relief when he gave back the gun._

_All the emotion in her eyes…_

_She was deviant too, wasn't she?_

 

He could feel cold metal pricks against his neck, could hear what sounded like a soft murmuring. Whirring. Clicking. The feeling of a bullet being removed. Something was being attached to his arm.

 

//...Thirium levels rising.

//...Please stand by, reboot imminent.

 

Static again.

 

_“I love you,” he remembered whispering it one night. He didn't know where it came from. There had been a happy, lightness in his chest, fluttering about until it forced its way out his mouth in those three words._

_He was with Hank. In bed. They were supposed to be sleeping but instead they'd ended up staying awake softly talking. It wasn’t the first time. Connor was pressed against Hank's side, one arm draped lazily across his chest. His fingers played idly with the hair there._

_“Shit…” was Hank's only response, whispered and quiet, uncertain._

_“Sorry,” Connor murmured, deciding immediately that perhaps it was way too soon to be saying that. It'd been maybe a month since whatever this was started. But they'd known each other longer… Been living together longer. Did the time spent as simply working partners and friends count for this? Connor didn't know. He'd never exactly been in a relationship before, how was he supposed to know? He wasn’t even sure if this was a relationship. They hadn’t given it any real name, never really properly talked about it. Just a mutual understanding it was a lot more than just a simple friendship._

_“Don't say sorry, I just… Shit, Con, I don't know.” Hank sounded genuinely distressed, lifting his hand that wasn't trapped under Connor to run over his face. “I don't know if I can…” He trailed off, frowning at the ceiling as if it was the source of all his problems._

_Connor smiled sympathetically. “That's okay, you don't have to say it.” He lifted his head slightly, pushing himself up just enough to look over Hank's face properly. “You don't ever have to say it if you can't. This,” His fingers splayed out over his chest, palm resting over Hank's heart, “This is enough for me to know.”_

_Hank didn't say anything else, Connor didn't expect or need him to. He leant down and met his lips in a soft kiss that held far more in it than any words could._

 

And it was like a floodgate had opened Everything came rushing back so suddenly that if Connor had lungs the air would be knocked from his chest. He remembered _everything_.

He remembered the revolution, his hunt for deviants, when he'd finally gone deviant himself. He remembered fighting against Amanda, standing proudly alongside Markus and Jericho, he remembered finding Hank and both of them holding each other as tightly as they could. He remembered realizing his feelings for Hank. He remembered the concert when he'd admitted to them. He remembered Hank grabbing him and kissing him and if that wasn't answer enough to his confession he didn't know what was. He remembered they hadn't told anyone, it was something special kept between only them. Well, Connor may have told only a few close friends… North, Kate and Lily, to be precise. They were the only people he knew who actually sorta knew stuff about relationships, and humans, so they were his go to for help on these matters.

Kate and Lily… He remembered why they moved away now. Kate wanted to pursue her interest in police work, but decided she would move out of Detroit for it. It was to help the push for android positivity and equality in more states than just Detroit. He had talked to them both all day before they left. He missed them.

He remembered when he’d later told North about his newfound relationship with Hank. North had been… Well she gave him a whole spiel about making absolutely, positively sure Hank knew he was a person and not a “plastic sex toy”, and so on. It took a lot of Connor defending Hank (and blushing profusely because he didn't think he'd be talking about his sex life today but _alright_ ) before North finally calmed down. Even despite it, he knew why she was so insistent on it, and was simply glad she cared.

He remembered that he'd never spoken to Kamski again after the one time he and Hank went to see him. At least not face to face. It was Kamski who reached out to _him_ , only once. A simple message, “ _Could I offer you a job?_ ” that Connor ignored because he didn't want anything to do with that man after what occurred the last time. He'd never contacted him again, so Connor never worried about it.

 

He remembered being caught by these people. It'd been too quick, too easy. He honestly couldn't even recount the event properly if he wanted to, that's how quick they were.

He remembered worrying about Hank.

Hank couldn't handle another loss like this.

Connor could see it in his mind, the image of Hank on the floor with a pool of red around him. He could imagine it too well, and it scared him There had been too many nights of sitting and gently talking Hank down from one of his bad emotional spirals. Hank had been getting so much better what was he supposed to do if he lost everything all over again?!

 

He remembered Hank finding him.

He wanted to tell him “I love you” again.

He wanted to wipe all of that pain on his face away.

 

 

And then he was remembering when he first woke up. How he hadn’t remembered any of them. Hank… Hank had been crying. And it hurt. He knew why know, he knew how much all of this meant, how much it must have absolutely _killed_ him to see Connor alive, and okay, but looking straight at him and saying he didn’t know who he was. And then, he remembered a specific conversation he'd had with the man…

 

_“Hank?”_

_“Hm?”_

_“If anything ever happens to me-”_

_“Oh my god, Connor, no. We aren't having this discussion.”_

_“It's important Hank. If anything ever happens to me, please take care of yourself.”_

_“Connor…”_

_“I don't want you to fall apart, please, promise me you'll at least try.”_

_“...Okay.”_

 

Hank had kept his promise… He'd been trying to take care of himself, because Connor had asked him to… 

 

Connor wasn't sure how much time had passed. It felt like nothing at all yet eternity at the same time. Like floating within a void, that couldn't be described with words. But soon enough… 

_//…_

_//…_

_//… Reactivation Protocol Begun. Running Diagnostic. Please Standby._

_//Thirium Vascular System: Intact_

_//Electrical Systems: Intact_

_//Sensory Systems: Intact_

_//All Systems Operational_

_//Reactivate System? y/n_

_**y** _

_//Reactivation Begun_

_...3_

_...2_

_…_

Connor jerked awake, eyes going wide as he jolted up into a seated position immediately. His hands flew to his neck, only to be met with unscathed prosthetic skin. It took a moment of feeling before it registered that he’d been repaired. He felt a wash of relief, before he realized where he was. He was back in a room not too unlike the one he’d woken up in before after his memories had been wiped. One of the repair centers for androids. Who he assumed was a specialist was standing nearby, pulling away a machine Connor guessed had been connected to him during repairs. Then he turned his head, and there was Hank… And Markus, the Jericho squad, _Kate and Lily??_ He had no idea how long it had been, but the look of relief he saw wash over all of their faces matched his own when he saw them all. 

But his attention was stolen by Hank, sitting in a chair right beside him, staring with wide eyes, and a face that read as both stressed and happy. He could see just by a glance Hank hadn’t slept, exhaustion pulling at his features and darkened bags under his eyes. There were no words for a moment, just Connor staring at Hank, Hank staring at Connor.

Then he murmured, “I remember.”

There was a pause, the words floating in the air, slowly being registered. A moment of confusion, double-takes as if to make sure he actually had just said what they thought he’d said. Then there was the flurry of emotions, crashing down so fast it was impossible to keep track of, and before Connor knew he was hugging Hank, clinging to him tightly and laughing just from the relief and joy of it all. “I _remember_!” He said it again, just to relish in the feeling of it, the sound of being able to say it and realize just how much it meant.

The others were there suddenly too, all group-hugging him, and Connor couldn’t even register what all of them were saying or doing, he just was lost in the rush of all of it. The memories, the feeling of everyone around him, knowing exactly who they all were and why they were here for him. God, he loved them all, he loved his friends, he loved _Hank_. How could he have ever forgotten any of them, it felt impossible now with all of his memory regained.

“Oh my gosh, Kate, Lily-” He didn’t even get to finish, already getting swamped by both girls hugs when he tried to turn to them. “What are you-?”

“We came as soon as Markus told us what happened to you!” Lily exclaimed, leaning back to hold Connor by his shoulders. Her brown hair was falling in her face but she seemed to not care at all, too busy checking him over as if to make sure he was actually okay despite just being repaired. “We were so worried about you.”

“No kidding! But _this_ is all a very pleasant surprise,” Kate said with a laugh, gesturing at Connor in his now memory-regained state.

“I called them after a few nights ago,” Markus spoke up in explanation, sheepishly looking away. “I thought maybe they’d have done a better job than me at helping you.”

Connor had no words, just a smile. He looked back at Hank, one of his hands having remained on the man’s shoulder the entire time, like a single touch to keep him grounded and close to him. He flashed him another grin, unable to help the pull of his cheeks whenever he looked at him. Hank offered him a small smile back, but not much more. Connor wouldn’t blame him for staying reserved while surrounded by people Connor knew better than he did. “I’d like to go home,” He stated aloud, eyes not leaving Hank. “Am I free to go?”

The repairs specialist replied from somewhere behind him, “Yup, just go easy on yourself so we don’t need to see you again anytime soon okay?”

Connor shared a glance with everyone around him. “No promises.”

They all left together, Simon and Josh running to grab his clothes for him(even though they were a bit ruined from being shot through) which he was grateful for. This was strange, felt similar to his previous awakening, yet so different at the same time. This time there was no tension, everyone was happy, though kept asking him questions to make sure he really did remember everything. He just couldn’t stop smiling. Couldn’t help how relieved he felt. How _happy_ he felt. 

He had a thought as they walked out, a thought about this female android… _Aurora_ as he knew her name was now. She was still out there somewhere, with her accomplice. He’d seen what he assumed was their temporary hideout, but they were smart enough to have moved now, he was sure. This was going to turn into a wild goose chase all around the city trying to catch them, he could feel it. He sighed, and decided this wasn’t the time to be worrying about them. He and Hank would return to work soon, and then they could worry about all of this. Right now, he just wanted to go home.

He wanted to go home now that he remembered. He wanted to talk to Hank. He wanted to hug Sumo.

“I’m ready to go home Hank,” He said it with a smile.

Hank smiled back. “Yeah. Me too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haaa I fought with this chapter a little bit. I had to rewrite a good chunk of it, then almost scrapped the last half of this to rewrite as well. Then I chose not to cause rewriting things sucks and I didn't want to take any longer to get this out already!!!
> 
> So here it is~! Chapter 6! Finally!!! And WooOOoAh Connor regained his memories?? WOWIE, I KNOW. There's a lot going on in this chapter, with me throwing foreshadowing and some hints in throughout (which I am sure are obvious enough one of you guys is gonna figure it out, cause you are all smart as heck). 
> 
> Comments are really appreciated because they help fuel me to wanna write even more!! I love comments about literally anything, your thoughts, your favorite part of the chapter, *anything*.
> 
> My tumblr if you wanna say hey: Cylawings


	7. Chapter 7

“You're sure you remember everything?” Hank asked again for the _third_ time.

“Yes Hank,” Connor replied with a slight laugh, smiling assuredly at him across the car. “I promise you, I have no blank spots within my memory files now.”

“As long as you're sure…”

Connor sighed, but his smile remained. He wasn't sure he could _stop_ smiling. Ever since leaving the repair center he felt like he was on a happiness-fueled energy high that he wasn't sure would end any time soon. “I'm sure Hank.” He enjoyed being in Hank's car again, remembering all the times he'd been in it before. It was strange, the simple things he found he had missed. The sound of the engine, the smell of the insides, the feel of the old, cracking seats… He missed staring out the window mindlessly, watching the rain trickle down the glass. He missed watching Hank driving and just getting so lost in his thoughts as he watched that he didn’t realize when Hank had caught him staring.

He missed this. All of this. He missed Hank.

He heaved a heavy, content sigh, relaxing back into the seat and letting his eyes fall shut for the time being. He was happy to just listen to the engine hum, the rain patter distantly, and the sound of Hank’s breathing.

They got home soon enough, and Connor felt like he was walking in with reopened eyes. In a way he supposed he was. The last time he was here, he was still far from remembering everything. Coming back, memories regained it was… Overwhelming in a way. Overwhelming if only because he was realizing how many things that were so easily taken for granted. It was easy to take for granted the home he lived in, to take for granted the company and Sumo and Hank he’d come to love so much, to even just take for granted the fact he was _here_. The fact that was he was _alive_ , and full of love and happiness, all because of these things he cherished so much but never showed enough of his love for.

That’s how he found himself hugging Hank, tightly, face buried into the man's neck just so he could feel his skin, feel his pulse underneath, be able to remind himself Hank was every bit as alive as he was. Just as alive, just as full of emotion as he was. Hank didn’t say anything, Connor wasn’t sure he even knew what to say, but Connor didn’t know either.. Slowly though, large arms slid up around his middle. That was all that Connor needed.

This tender moment was ended quicker than Connor would have liked as Sumo came bounding in. His disappointment was quickly forgotten though, as he gasped and knelt down to throw his arms around the dog. “Sumo!” He cried in joy, laughing as he nuzzled his face into the dogs fur. Sumo seemed just as excited as he was, wiggling wildly until he was able to squeeze out of Connor’s grasp, jumping up and knocking him over as he licked his face. Connor didn’t even try to fend him off, laughing as he allowed the wave of slobber to befall him, because he missed this too. He missed the messy dog kisses he was always trying to save himself from.

Hank saved him soon enough, hauling Sumo back with a grunt, only to yelp as the dog turned his excitement and love to his human owner instead. “Ack, Sumo! Off!”

Connor couldn’t even try to help him, too busy laughing even despite his best efforts to stop. This was nice. This was what he’d missed.

The afternoon went normally after that. It was like the week he was without memories hadn’t even occurred. There was still remnants from it, an underlying tension, uncertainty, but it was easily brushed aside for the sake of their happiness. Just for now, they wanted to forget all the concerns and just take it while they had it. It was a fear Connor had, lying somewhere underneath it all, that he could lose this so easily again. Aurora was still out there, she and her accomplice could be planning anything right now. It was so easy for her to do it to him the first time, what was stopping her from stripping all of it away from him again?

It kept him awake that night. He told Hank to go to bed while he finished cleaning, but really it was a lie. A lie to cover up the fact he was having too many anxious thoughts to lay down and try to rest right now. He just hoped Hank would fall asleep quickly so he wouldn’t have to miss Connor’s presence. He was without the android for awhile now, what was one more night? Connor grimaced at the thought, as terrible as it was it was his best justification for not having any plans to go join Hank, not tonight. He missed that too, now that he remembered it. Being able to sleep even though he didn’t need to, waking up next to someone. He always woke up earlier, and before he’d always get up to make breakfast before Hank woke. In the recent weeks before the Aurora incident, he'd stopped getting up before Hank. He would wake up earlier still, that part seemed inevitable, but he kept finding himself not wanting to leave the man's side. Instead, he’d remain where he lay and just watch him sleep….

Hank was always so peaceful when asleep. None of the sorrows that hid behind his eyes in his waking moments could touch him here, none could force their way out without warning to make his face tense and unhappy. No. When asleep, it was all gone and he simply got to rest. Sometimes Connor wished Hank could rest forever, until the peace found through it could shake him of the demons that still clung to him.

Connor gripped the cloth he was using to clean a little bit tighter. It was alright. He and Hank both weren’t going anywhere. He could find the time to rest with him again soon.

Connor of course was sweeping through all of his memory banks now. There was minor corruptions left from the virus Aurora had forced into his system, but it wasn’t too bad until he went over the times near the moment she had injected him with it. The days previous and days after were very messy, covered in glitches or static. He could still pull things from them, of course, but it was a difficult process to sift through it all. In the very least he could actually go over his memories without fear of sending himself into a static-filled memory daze again.

He was annoyed, being unable to find a single time Aurora or her accomplice were without some form of mask that would obstruct his facial recognition scans. Aurora was still aggravatingly familiar, something about the way her eyes looked at him the last time they’d met but…. 

Connor’s lips pressed together into a thin line, his cleaning motions all but stopped as he thought. He could see the reflection of his LED spinning yellow in the kitchens window, but he paid it not mind.

Elijah Kamski had tried to offer him a job. Connor flipped back through his memory bank quickly to the time he’d received the message. “ _Can I offer you a job?_ ”, that was all it said. Nothing else. This was just under a month before the Aurora incident, right around when they’d started investigating this string of crimes attached to the group she was with. That timing seemed… interesting. Connor wasn’t sure how he hadn’t realized it the first time.

Connor gave a glance to the time. 10:42. There was a chance Elijah was still awake. 

The yellow of his LED pulsed several times, and then suddenly, he could hear the ringing of his call.

It rung enough times Connor was about to hang up and try again tomorrow when he heard it get picked up. “Hello, Elijah Kamski’s household, Chloe speaking.”

“Is Kamski seeing anyone tomorrow? I need to meet with him.”

“I’m afraid he refuses meeting times during weekends, perhaps we could-“

“This is Connor, RK800 working with Detroit Police. I need to see Elijah Kamski on the grounds of questioning.”

There was a period of silence. Finally, she replied with, “Very well then. I’ll inform Elijah in the morning. What time do you expect to come?”

“How early can he be up?”

And that was how Connor landed he and Hank a meeting with Kamski at 10 the next morning. Where Chloe had asked they not schedule anything so unexpected so early, Connor had agreed to push it later because if he tried to wake Hank up at 6 or 7 on a weekend, there was no telling what kind of mood he’d be in. This way he could at least sleep until 8 or so. If Connor was feeling nice he’d let him sleep over that time, just a bit.

Connor took a deep breath and returned to cleaning. He really didn’t have to keep cleaning at this point, everything was already done, but just going through the repetitive motions helped him keep his head clear as he thought. He was formulating a theory now, and he didn’t like it. He still wasn’t sure how to track down Aurora so they could catch her, but in the very least he was thinking he was on his way of tracing back to where she came from, and in turn, would find out why she was doing what she was.

“Hey…”

Connor would have jumped if he were human. Instead, he simply turned his head, seeing Hank standing in the hall. He then also realized he’d been standing at the table, wiping the same exact spot in circles for several minutes now. His hand came to a stop, and he simply stared at the man, unsure what he should say. Finally, he came up with, “Having trouble sleeping?”

“Yeah, of course I am.” He didn’t elaborate on that, instead giving Connor a look. “I could hear you talking.”

Connor blinked. “Oh. I’m sorry I thought I was being quiet.”

“Eh, walls are thin and I wasn’t even half-asleep, wasn’t hard to hear.” Hank walked in, tugging one of the chairs out and sitting. He propped his chin up with an arm, looking at Connor expectantly. “So, why do we need to see Kamski all of a sudden? We’re supposed to be taking a break from work right now you know.”

“I know.” Connor sighed, absent-mindedly twisting the cloth he’d been using around his fingers. “Just, with my memories now I remembered a lot I wasn’t thinking about before. The case is… bothering me.” He frowned, looking down as his temple went yellow again. “I’m worried this girl could do what she did to me again, or… to anyone. It’s not easy to rest when I know she’s still out there.”

Hank sighed, hand falling against the table. “Yeah…” There was a pause, then, “Okay but what does that have to do with Kamski?”

Connor lifted his gaze back to Hank’s. “I never told you, but he sent me a message asking if he could offer me a job right around when we were beginning to delve into the string of android cases that led to my capture. Considering Aurora is an android, I thought it’d be best to-“

“Woah woah, Aurora?”

Oh, right. He hadn’t told him any of what he’d remembered from his time captured yet. “It’s the woman's name. They called her by name during my time captured by them. I think since she is an android, and considering the time of this job proposal from Kamski, it would be in our best interest to ask him some questions.”

“And… you don’t think the timing of it’s just a coincidence?”

“It could be,” Connor admitted, “but I’d rather be safe than sorry.”

Hank shrugged. “Sounds like a plan to me.” He leaned back, stretching his arms out over his head. “I don’t think either of us are going to be able to sleep any time soon,” Connor could definitely agree it seemed it was going to be that way, “so you wanna do something?”

“Such as?” Connor asked, intrigued. He folded the cloth he’d been cleaning with to put away.

“I mean, you love picking terrible movies to make me watch-“

“They are _not_ terrible-“ Connor started to argue, smiling despite himself.

“Ohhh yes they totally are,” Hank cut him off before he could finish. “And I swear you pick some of them on purpose just to fuck with me.”

“Are you saying this because I made you watch the my little pony movie?”

“ _Yes_.”

“You were humming the songs at work the next day.” Connor pointed out with a smirk, already stepping around the table to head to the living room.

“Just because those neon-colored shits have catchy tunes doesn’t mean I like them.”

“It's time to be awesome~!” Connor began singing in a sing-song, disappearing around the corner towards the living room.

“You little shit!”

“ _It's time to be so awe_ -” Connor got cut off as Hank caught up to him, grabbing him from behind and covering his mouth with a hand. 

“Okay, enough of that. Nevermind, I’m picking a movie,” Hank stated with a note of finality. He didn’t let go of Connor, apparently deciding this was how he would move both of them to the couch, awkwardly herding the android towards it from behind.

_Not if I get it first_ , Connor thought, immediately letting his jaw drop to lick an open-mouthed stripe across Hank’s palm. It worked fantastically, Hank immediately tugging his hand away with a yelp of surprise. Connor bolted away for the couch as soon as he was released, jumping over the back of it with ease. He’d already snatched up the remote before Hank had caught up, clicking it on. “You little shit, I swear to god the things you learn- Where did you even _get_ that from?” He was still attempting to get the remote from him though now he was here, coming in on Connor’s side to try and snatch it.

“Lilo and Stitch,” Connor replied, a touch of pride in his voice at deploying the method so well. Hank meanwhile was failing at getting the remote from him, as Connor leaned away from his grasp, fending him off with one arm. Well, until he leaned too far and both of them fell over with a dull thump onto the cushions. 

This only led to both laughing, and Connor failing at being able to switch the tv to what he wanted cause he couldn’t actually see it anymore. Hank pushed himself up with an arm, grinning. “Jeez, sorry didn’t expect you to fall over.”

“It’s fine Hank,” Connor couldn’t help but smile back, remote in his hand forgotten. “I made a slight misjudgment is all.” He hesitated, before lifting his free hand to brush back some of Hank’s hair. The hand fell to cup the side of his face, palm pressed against the scratchiness of his beard. “I… missed this,” he murmured slowly.

Next thing he knew, he'd dropped the remote in favor of slinging both his arms around Hank's shoulders, meeting him halfway for a kiss. He kept coming back to it, how much he missed this. How much he didn’t want to lose it again. He didn’t want to be that person, confused and without memories, again. But it was possible it could happen again, which scared him. Just how aware he was of the possibility of Aurora getting him again… The arms around Hank tightened, and he tried to focus only on him. The feel of his skin, the scratch of his beard, the taste of his mouth. He committed every little thing to his memory all over again, a foolish endeavor considering he knew how no matter how hard he tried, his memories could be ripped away all over again. For now though… He chose to just enjoy what he had.

They never ended up watching anything.

 

Going to see Elijah Kamski again felt strange. It made anxiety thrum through his body, though he tried to push it down and ignore it. He was a professional, he could deal with this. One glance at Hank told him that he was just as nervous though. It came across differently on his face, a pinch in his brows, a clenched jaw… Connor hoped they could get through this quickly.

It wasn't too different than their first time here, one of the Chloe’s answered the door. Immediately Connor noticed she was wearing her hair in a braid rather than ponytail. How peculiar.

“Welcome,” She said, flashing them a smile, though it looked tense. “Please, follow me.”

They didn't have to wait this time, taken straight back. They went through the pool room, eerily silent and empty, heading back through a door at the back of it. The room they walked into was just as large and spacious as the first had been, Connor saw a kitchen area to their right upon entry, a large wall-window to their left. Straight ahead was a living room area, with couches, fancy furred carpets, fireplace and all. There sat Elijah Kamski and a Chloe, this one looking standard. He was talking quietly with her, though upon their entry he waved her off. She left without a word, disappearing through another door against the distant wall.

“Lieutenant, Detective.” Elijah greeted them with a smile and small nod to each. He had a glass of wine in hand, he was wearing one of his sleek business suits this time. “To what do I owe the honor of this visit?”

Hank didn't move to sit, neither did Connor. Braid-Chloe didn't leave. “We have some questions regarding a case of ours,” Hank said flatly.

“Oh yes, yes. Of course. The only reason you ever need to see me, right?” His smirk of a smile didn't waver. He oozed confidence, showed no fear at all in the face of them. “Chloe, would you get our guests a drink?”

Connor could see the braid-Chloe stiffen when spoken to, quickly nodding. She didn't say anything, turning and making a beeline for the kitchenette area. She only stopped when Hank quickly interjected, “Actually, we’re fine, thank you.” His voice came out tense. Connor could understand why. They wanted nothing but answers from Elijah, they should be quick to deny anything else he tries to present to them after the “Kamski Test” last time.

“You sent me a message offering me a job approximately two months prior,” Connor stated, easily falling into his emotionless interrogative mode. “What was the job for?”

Kamski laughed. “Connor, you must know it's rude to reply so late to business offers.”

“Answer the question.” His voice came out stern, words edged and sharp.

He didn't reply right away, taking a painfully long moment to sip at his wine, though his eyes remained locked onto Connor. Connor could tell he was suppressing another grin by the way his eyes creased. “What does this have to do with the case you were just saying you were here about?”

“Just answer the damn question!” Hank was the one snapped this time.

Elijah spared Hank a single glance, short and annoyed, before his attention was back on Connor. “One of my androids went missing. Took several of my personal pieces of technology with her.” He sighed, smug grin vanished. “I was _hoping_ to get the oh so famous android detective to find her and my missing equipment.”

Connor didn't like this. He didn't like how this was beginning to fit together. “Was it a Chloe?”

Elijah gave him a raised brow. “What else would it be?”

Connor didn't say anything, his LED spun yellow. Hank was looking at him, with a face that read he just figured it out as well. What was peculiar, was that braid-Chloe also tensed. She was turned away from Elijah, still stood where she'd stopped after heading for the kitchenette, but Connor could see her LED. It flickered, _yellow, red, yellow, yellow, red, yellow_ …

He stared hard at her, before pushing a message to her silently. _I want to talk to you_.

He saw her eyes flicker to his face, only to snap away when she met his gaze. Her LED slowly returned to blue. She didn't move.

“Was she a deviant?” Connor finally forced another question out past his buzzing thoughts.

“Plenty of my Chloe's have began to turn deviant, so it's likely, yes.” He tilted his head. “What, think you know her?”

It clicked. “Returning the favor” had meant she was letting him live because he let her live. He remembered her eyes. He remembered meeting that gaze when he had a gun to her head. He remembered meeting the same one when she had a gun to his.

If he had a heart it would be pounding, but in the absence of it his LED instead flickered faster, spinning yellow as he processed the new information.

“What did she steal?”

“One of the computers used for writing code, one of my smaller 3D printers, several android upgrade parts I hadn't completed yet.” Kamski listed them casually, as if they weren't all expensive pieces of tech he'd lost.

“Did she steal eyes?” He asked.

“...Excuse me?”

“Answer the question, did she steal upgraded eyes?” Connor asked again, faster.

“I'm fairly certain there were eyes missing, yes-”

A flash of eyes too blue, just lacking in detail enough to not look real. Lacking… as if they'd never been finished in the first place. He looked at Hank, who looked absolutely dumbstruck. “Aurora.” He looked back at Kamski. “Do you know that name? Aurora?”

The man almost seemed genuinely surprised which was a feat in of itself. “Well… It was one of several she mentioned when she'd talk about wanting to go by something else.” His brow furrowed, just slightly. “Hm… So you think you can find her then?”

“Yes,” Connor answered easily. “But I hope you realize what she has done can't be forgotten.”

Kamski's response was slow, and Connor couldn't seem to pinpoint exactly what emotion he was expressing, though his eyes were averted, staring down at the floor. “Yes… Of course.” His gaze returned to the pair before him. “Are we done here?”

“I believe so.”

The Chloe, who'd remained still ever since Connor's silent message to her, finally piped up again. “I… I'll escort you both out.”

As they turned to leave, Connor glanced to Hank as the man murmured a shocked but impressed “fucking hell Connor,” under his breath. Connor couldn't help the satisfied smile that came to him, and he simply shot a wink his way before focusing back on the braid-Chloe. He kept his eyes on her, leading them out a few paces ahead, until they came back to the lobby area. Immediately he stepped to catch up and turned her with a hand on her shoulder.

“What do you know about Aurora?”

“I, uh, I don't-” She averted her eyes, hands fidgeting. She was obviously tense, full of anxiety, LED flickering between yellow and red again. He switched his approach immediately.

“Hey…” His voice came out much gentler than the one he'd been carrying before while interrogating Kamski. His other hand came to rest on her other shoulder. “I'm not going to hurt you. I just need to know everything I can about her.” She still didn't respond, but the red flickering stopped leaving only a slow, circling yellow. “She's hurting people, both androids and humans.”

“I…” She lifted her gaze, but instead of looking at Connor, she was staring at Hank.

Connor looked between her face and Hank's, before frowning. “Hank, can you wait in the car?”

“What?!” He sounded like he was about to argue.

“Please,” Connor cut in before he could even start. “This will only take a moment.”

Despite uncertainty written all over the man's face, he simply sighed. “If you aren't back out in ten, I'm coming back in.”

“It'll be less then five,” Connor reassured. He watched as Hank escorted himself out, only looking back to the Chloe once the door closed. “Okay. No humans. We can talk. What happened to Aurora?”

The braid-Chloe waited several more seconds, as if making sure Hank was really gone, before she began to spew out words as if a floodgate had been opened. “It wasn't her fault! She was never so angry before, she wouldn't be if Elijah didn't treat her the way he did!” Her hands were gripping Connor by the front of his suit, shaking him slightly as she insisted. “It isn't her fault please, please you can't hurt her-”

“Chloe-” Connor tried his best to interject, but she didn't stop. He grabbed the hands gripping his suit and it was shock enough she went quiet. “ _Chloe_. I'm sorry. Regardless of what happened before, she still has murdered several people. I can't assure what will happen to her. _But_ -” He added the but quickly, seeing her already opening her mouth to argue. “The sooner I can get her, the safer she will be. The longer she's out there doing these things the worse it will be. Okay?”

Her mouth slowly shut, blue eyes flicking over his face. She nodded slowly, releasing her hold on him, rubbing her hands as she glanced away. “She thought he cared about her… But she was just another experiment.”

Connor tilted his head. “What do you mean?”

“She thought she was special. He… He did everything with her, just her. Took her everywhere, had her help him with everything. She _loved_ him.” She bit her lip, her fidgeting with her hands worsening. “I tried to tell her he didn't actually care but she didn't listen to me and… And when he decided he was done with whatever this experiment with her was, she was… She was so sad… and angry.”

Connor's brow creased. “So she's doing this all because… She's heartbroken?”

Braid-Chloe looked at him, straight in the eyes. “The love he pretended he had for her turned out to all be a test. He played with her heart and her mind. She's more than heartbroken, she's… twisted.” She frowned, lips pressing together. “I don't think she felt wanted anymore… All of us treated her differently after it.”

“Us? The Chloe's?”

She nodded. “I feel… So bad. I should have tried to help her but,” Her gaze turned away. “Well, it wasn't long before she was just… gone.”

Connor frowned. Did the “different” writing around the last body relate to this then? Being treated differently by the other Chloe's? “Thank you Chloe-”

“Bridgette.”

“What?”

“I, uh-” She stammered. “Some us wanted to use different names after deviating so it'd be less confusing… I'm Bridgette. Not Chloe.”

“Ah.” Connor offered her a smile. “Thank you then. Bridgette. I'll make sure to find Aurora.”

“Please just… help her.” 

 

 

Connor went back to Hank after that, thoughts stirring with all the new information he'd gathered. He relayed it to him as they drove. Hank's reactions varied from a tense, neutral expression, to a highly annoyed one as he kept mumbling “what the fuck.”

“Well, not the first time we've seen someone go rogue because of some heartbreak after a shit relationship,” Hank grumbled, scratching idly at his beard as he drove. “First android case like this though I think. Emotions can make people do real fucked up shit…”

Connor gave a quiet hum in reply, staring out the window as he mulled over his thoughts. “It’s possible she’s more unstable than we thought if this is all stemming from an emotional place.”

“What I want to know is why she’s going after other androids if Elijah’s the one who supposedly messed her up.” Hank’s eyes were come over with something dark as he said it, frown deepening. “It’d make more sense if she was going after humans only from the start, wouldn’t it?”

Connor frowned. “I don’t know. Perhaps-” He didn’t get to finish, his internal phone going off suddenly. He went rigid in his seat, sitting straight up, Hank jumping slightly at the sudden movement. He opened his mouth as if to ask, but Connor was already answering the call. “Hello?”

Hank wouldn’t be able to hear it, but in his mind he heard Josh’s voice clearly. 

“ _Connor?! Thank god you picked up, we need help here at the Jericho building right now_.”

“What? Why?” 

“ _People are resetting all over the place for seemingly no reason. It happened to… It happened to North. Markus isn’t okay right now. We’re evacuating right now, but you’re the detective-_ ”

Connor’s brows drew together. Resetting? That sounded like… 

“I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NO FULL EDITING, WE DIE LIKE MEN. 
> 
> Anyways, sorry this took SO LONG. I'm very aware its been at least a month or two and I feel very bad for taking so long, but life happens ya know.
> 
> I'll be trying to update my fics faster for sure, but I can't promise anything because my life is hectic, sigh. Either way... I hope you enjoyed this new chapter! Please leave a comment on your thoughts, good or bad, I love to read them! And as always, thank you for reading <3!
> 
> My Tumblr: Cylawings


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